But I can't decide whether it's better to tell them by a letter I hand them that explains the long story I have, or if I should just say it. Has anyone else gone through this, and if so do you have any advice?
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When my sister came out, she did it face to face. She didn't make a big deal of it and set everyone down, she just said it in the car one day. My mom was upset at first, but it was more about her worrying about the bigotry and stigma my sister would face than anything. Soon after, it was past and life went on. Not sure if that helps or not but, like many things in life, it probably won't be as bad as you worry it might be.