But I can't decide whether it's better to tell them by a letter I hand them that explains the long story I have, or if I should just say it. Has anyone else gone through this, and if so do you have any advice?
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I'd start with this probably isint the place to post this kind of question. That being said, ignore the horrible people and see if any of the advice really makes sense to you. It's your decision how to tell them.