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Edited by Capiton Render: 1/12/2015 7:03:46 PM
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Bungie, im starting a new religion

In light of having to respect everyone's religious beliefs,and not really having any, i think its time i have one that fits me, and im betting a lot of you will join. It will be the Church of the cosmic wang Anyone can join, as long as you renounce all other faiths. Our purpose is to use the fact that others must respect our beliefs, to further the eradication of all other beliefs. So it shall work like this. =================================== If i meet say, an outspoken buddhist, i will ask him. Will you renounce buddhism and join the CCW. When he says no, we will tie him down, force feed him, and force material wealth upon him, and when he says, "please respect my beliefs, this isnt fair" Ill whisper in his ear, saying, " Respect mah buliefs bruh"and continue until he converts ================================================= If i meet a christian- or the myriad of retarded off shoots, ill ask. Will you renounce christian- or the myriad of retarded off shoots, and join the CCW. And if he refuses, i will force him to live by his strict laws of his religion, with no relapse, eat only fish and bread until he converts, and if he asks, "please respect my beliefs" ill whisper in his ear, Respect mah buliefs bruh"and continue until he converts ============================= If i meet a jewish person, ill ask them Will you renounce judism and join the CCW. When he refuses, ill force him to eat ham, sew forskin onto his penis, and take all his money until he converts, and if he asks, " please respect my beliefs" ill whisper in his ear, Respect mah buliefs bruh"and continue until he converts ============================== If i meet a muslim person, ill ask them Will you renounce Islam and join the CCW. When he refuses, i will have a lesbian -blam!- him in his butt with a strap on made of pig skin, while respecting others beliefs,a nd giving women many rights, and if he says," please respect my beliefs" ill whisper in his ear, Respect mah buliefs bruh"and continue until he converts ========================= If i meet a Scientologist ill ask Will you renounce Scientology and join the CCW. When they refuse, i will make them watch the science channel, and have tom cruise lick their feet, when they say " please respect my beliefs" ill whisper in his ear, Respect mah buliefs bruh"and continue until he converts ====================== If i meet an agnostic/atheist you guys arent religious, so cool with us So from this you should get the basic tenants of my new religion. I dont like yours, and youre wrong, and to convert you to mine, i will make you sin in yours, and since you will be going to hell, you may as well join mine, and redeem yourself. ============================ A little about CCW and what you get. 1; Anyone can join -gay, youre cool -stupid- youre cool -furry- cool trans- cool basically as long as you arent a religous person, unless youre a CCW, youre cool 2: Afterlife Dont know, how could we guess this, basically you get too choose, and the cosmic wang will make it happen, well im guessing he will, thats what he said to me. 3:Sins: Pretty simple, be civil to your common man, dont do something you wouldnt want to happen,unless youre kinky and sadistic, not everyone likes that shit. None of this applies to religious people outside of CCW 4: you cannot convert to another religion, penalty is sodomization by cosmic wang 5: we have juice for everyone 6: once we rule the world as the only religion, we will all denounce it, and become pure humanists So, who would like to join our ranks, or make suggestions for the tenants of this glorious monument to the cosmic wang Herald of The Cosmic Wang Capiton Render Cardinal of the Cosmic Wang Otthild Officer Nasty Zizou Camfour Admiral123 Gatsby I ColdEmbrace I BioSmiley Bishops of the Cosmic Wang Blonic CamCamm Machetti Grampa Jesus Eli Followers of the Cosmic Wang SaltyMcSaltman Jono RailGun Neon Slayingold Shpip CrazyLincoln Ryan Sealcrest Coastal Set FuzzyWolfCub Co_____onut Marty Mojo1965 InstaCode FapolFu Zonda BigDaddyDrew47 Gucci Agent Space Wolf ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)'s of the Cosmic Wang Hipi07 Eggo Knights of the Cosmic Wang Gordonian Knot Mr Boom16 Crusaders of the Cosmic Wang Romantic Savior EnderWolf2013 TheCreator A vieny punisher for the Cosmic Wang AngerOfKratos ======================= Prayers for the Cosmic Wang [quote] Posted by:[b] Camfour[/b] Johnson is the true lord. Johnson is mighty. Johnson is wise. Johnson is superior. Johnson is our savior. Johnson is sekc. Johnson is our lord.[/quote]

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