Something has happened that I don't quite understand. I'm trying to get it sorted, but it seems like the friendship is hanging on by a slim thread.
Part of me thinks it's not worth saving and part of me thinks that's a horrible thing to say.
Distract me, please. Or offer general advice I may not have thought of. Or something. I don't know.
EDIT:
Ok, I'll explain what I know.
Met her a bit over three months ago.
We fell for each other.
Went on a date.
She has depression and bad anxiety and so we were cautious about jumping into anything.
Fast forward a bit and we decided it was best to just be friends.
We stayed fine for a while. Every so often we would have a fight but nothing too abnormal.
Over time her depression has gotten worse and physical contact (hugging, cuddling, holding hands, kissing, etc) is decreasing between us as it makes her uncomfortable.
About 2-3 weeks ago it seems that something has changed. We had planned to go see a movie together, but a few nights prior I asked how she was and she said that she was at the cinema, about to see it with someone else and that we were no longer going.
That started a rift. Now I feel as if I can't talk to her without causing a problem.
To make things more difficult, every year, around this time I get depressed and have [quote][/quote]bad anxiety. Literally talking to her can be a bad influence with her depression.
I feel like I'm being discarded for someone else and for some reason our friendship can't stay how it was with this new person. If it's as simple as that it seems to me that it's not worth the trouble, as much as it really pains me to say.
EDIT 2: I'm 19, she's turning 18 next month. We've both finished school.
EDIT 3: I'm seeing her tomorrow, we're going to hang out. I'm going to try to put out a positive vibe and see how it feels.
EDIT 4: This was originally posted on 10.3.15, this edit is on 12.5.15
The short version of what happened is that I haven't seen her since late March. Last time we spoke was the 27th of March I believe.
She now has a new boyfriend and I deleted her off of all social media because she refused to talk it out; instead basically saying we had to ignore everything.
It sucked, but it's a part of life I guess. People move in and out of it all the time.
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Good luck man
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You have only known her 3 months. Cut it off it's not worth it if that's how she acts
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Those dates in Edit 4 haven't happened yet. Are you back from the future?!?!?
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A bullet to the head solves everything.
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Edited by AfghaniClownPcrn: 5/12/2015 11:05:03 AMDistract you, ok, have you seen baby leopards.... They are really cute.... [spoiler]http://cdn.cutestpaw.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/01/l-cutest-baby-Leopard.jpg[/spoiler] That help?
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Don't waste your time with her if she is barely even your friend to begin with
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Have you properly said goodbye yet? It would probably be best if you both said goodbye to each other as friends, put your differences aside, put away anything you two had against each other and walk away with no regrets knowing you did the best you could.
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Should've given her a hug regardless of her depression. I'm sure she didn't hate you, she just met someone else. You all were just staying friends so maybe she thought that it wouldn't mean too much if she went out with someone. Relationship are also strenuous on time too so when she wasn't texting you it was probably because she was busy. It sucks that it ended the way that it did but I don't think that you can do too much right now. If you really want to try being friends again you could do something like mailing her a picture of you two doing something and on the back write something about friendship and foreverness.
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P.s. Don't take this negatively on yourself. Girls are like this all the time. They don't know how to be forthcoming. At least, a lot I've known. Don't think in terms of "being passed up" or "not good enough". That's your own negativity. She just wasn't the right one.
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It sounds to me like she was never that interested. If she has a boyfriend now it makes even more sense. Girls use a lot of excuses and rarely are open and honest about what they want. More than likely she never intended to see that movie with you. She was just being nice and hoping you'd get the hint eventually, but then with the movies she had to be blunt and say she was with someone else. It sucks but close that door and move on. To avoid this same situation in the future I would advise you to be careful of girls you go on dates with that say they just want to be friends. They are lying. Best believe they are still looking. They are just going to use you out of boredom until they get a boyfriend. Pretty much what happened here. Good luck to you.
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▕▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔╲┈┈┈ ▕╮╭┻┻╮╭┻┻╮╭▕╮╲┈┈ ▕╯┃╭╮┃┃╭╮┃╰▕╯╭▏┈ ▕╭┻┻┻┛┗┻┻┛┈▕┈╰▏┈ ▕╰━━━┓┈┈┈╭╮▕╭╮▏┈ ▕╭╮╰┳┳┳┳╯╰╯▕╰╯▏┈ ▕╰╯┈┗┛┗┛┈╭╮▕╮┈▏┈ [url=http://i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/744/952/c65.jpg]git gud[/url]
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Lol goodshit m8 now you can off yourself
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She probably thought you still had a thing for her and she met someone else and moved on.
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I'd try to salvage it one last time, but if not, you just need to move on man
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If u really still care about her tell her how u feel have a "heart to heart"
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Life is life dawg. (Duh...) You gotta fu(king live and let be. Plain and simple, but I think you've already made that conclusion.
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If they don't worry about how you feel, don't worry about how they feel. It feels like there should be exceptions when it cones to those who you care deeply for, but that's really what that rule is for.
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Purge her from your mind, act as if she had never existed.
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I know this thread is old but OP I pray you see my advice. And pray further still you are wise enough to heed it effectively. Please, please cut all contact with her permantley. It is for the best. You might not see the truth in what I say, especially if you have seen her recently but if you are to have a modicum of self-respect left as a man, you need to never speak to or see her again. Under any circumstances. She betrayed your trust and that is a crime that can never be forgiven.
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Life keeps going my friend, focus on what matters today and always look forward for tomorrow. I hope the best for you and stay strong buddy, you'll push through this.
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Edited by brickbuilt16: 5/12/2015 3:29:54 AMDude, I've been in a situation VERY similar to this. I just cut things of for like 2 months and things turned out fine, sometimes people just need a break from each other to start out fresh. Now these aren't 100% the same situations obviously just very very similar. Trust me, things get better :) EDIT: Just read the most recent edit that I missed, sorry it had to turn out that way but it was probably for the best and like I said things get better.
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You could edit and say how it went please.
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I'm sure it's already resolved judging by the date of last edit but..I hope all went well for you OP.
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Good luck :)
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Necrobump
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Decapitation seems to be a good way to deal with most mental issues... It has a couple of minor side effects but...