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4/14/2015 9:59:59 PM
29
[b]I walk into Starbucks with three gunshot wounds in my chest. I proceed to sit down at a table.[/b]
Well that was interesting.
[b]I slowly bleed out on the chair.[/b]
English
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Oh my god. You're gonna get blood on my chairs? No but really... You need help?
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Sure, I'm only bleeding out. I'm sure you could just let the maintenance droid clean up my blood.
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...Couldn't tell if that was sarcasm- *Barista droid begins mopping up blood* Damn it. Alright, lemme patch you up. *pulls out med kit from behind counter* *takes off your shirt to observe wound*
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Thank you.
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...Who the hell shoved tampons in your bullet holes?
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Uh....that would be me. I didn't know where a med kit was...so I acted quick.
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... Quick thinking I guess? Where the hell did you find the tampons? Wait. Never mind, I forgot that this is Starbucks. Don't tell me you also bandaged him up with a pair of Uggs as well.
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.........no..... *removes uggs*
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Oh shit! SOME ONE GET A DOCTOR!! Oh no... I need something to.... *sees a woman's purse. Digs through it and finds tampons* Ok....here we go. *i get the tampons and fold them up. Then I stick them in the bullet holes. It soaks and stops the bleeding for the moment*
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If you're wondering how this happened I can explain. I found a triple barrel shotgun. I decided to cut its barrel down a bit. After I cut the barrel I wanted to check if there was any metal dust on the newly cut barrel and it miss fired. Thank God I wasn't able to look yet, or there would be three bullet holes in my forehead.
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Your an idiot gamer.
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No I wasn't gaming [spoiler]I was rping[/spoiler]
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[spoiler]sorry. I meant your an idiot lonelygame. Still luv u though[/spoiler]
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[spoiler]o bby[/spoiler]
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"Dude!!! You could have asked!!!!!" Smacks you then... "Wow you really know your stuff."
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[spoiler]HAHAHAHAHAHA[/spoiler]
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Thanks. I learned that on some weird T.V show. I guess T.V is informative then!
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"Well that's one way to learn."
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Hasnt the UNSC teach anyhting besides poitning a gun? *disinfects hands* Ok here we go *takes otu the bullets* where is it *looks at your belt, and grabds a can* Bio-spray this hould do. *sprays the substance which covers the wounds*
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"Good to see there is a Doctor around."
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I am no doctor I had to do this to msyelf during the MArs/Venus conflcit but hte bullet was bigger
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With the materials I had I couldn't do much. Plus! The doctor said I did good!
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All I care about is not being dead. Now, can someone check if my new shotgun has blood or metal dust on it, I really need to now.
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*checks. It shoots almost hitting me.* Damnit! Does it have a life of its own?!
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I found it in the wastelands, so probably.
