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Edited by The Stranger:
5/9/2015 9:39:37 AM
52
The Church of Engrapadora
Lo ye little Flooding. All hail Engrapadora the great and bathe in the glory of the horse vag!
There was a time when Lord Engra walked the earth, bringing enlightenment and salvation to the people of the Flood. Beset on all sides by Ninjas and non-believers he spake his words of enlightenment for all to hear and we had peace in our souls.
Then the Lords of Darkness, Bungie they shall be called, unleashed the great alt-extinction and cut our Lord and Masters power. But, before he left this world to fight for us on the other side, he left us with a promise. A promise of hope and salvation, and this is what he spake:
[quote]"Woe to you oh ninjas and bungie, for I shall return to thee! In the coming summer, around June or July, my main becometh unbanned and I shall return to you all to spread the glory of the horse vag."
[/quote]
I took heed to these words. I keep them in my heart that one day I might know salvation. But until that day cometh, I shall spread his word, shout it for all to hear so that they may know redemption. Join me brothers and sisters! Join me in the worship of his saving grace. We shall be known by our creed, laid out by Lord Engra himself, speak it with pride and comfort.
Horse Vag Is Best Vag
So be not sad. When his absence weighs heavy on your soul, come to this place. Surround yourself in believers and rest assured that he will return. The second coming is neigh!
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All hail!
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1 Reply
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NO!!! ENGRA SUCKS
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2 RepliesI've heard tales of this.. [i]Engrapadora.[/i] I would meet your Horse Vag god, and perhaps exchange trade secrets. [i]Yeeesss..[/i]
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#horsegenitalsforlife
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4 RepliesEdited by Brob: 5/9/2015 3:43:40 PMI was only 9 years old. I loved Engrapadora so much. I has all of the movies and toys. I pray to Engrapadora every night before bed, thanking him for the horses I've been given. My dad hears me and calls me a heretic. I knew he was just jealous of my devotion to Engrapadora. I called him a -blam!- My dad grabs my horse and throws it at me and sends me to the ninja dungeon. Its cold, and my face hurts. A ninja is t-bagging me. I feel a warmth moving towards me. Its Engrapadora! He whispers in my ear and says "Horse vag is life". Engrapadora grabs me with his powerful hooves and puts me on my hands and knees. I'm ready. I spread my rainbow dash for Engrapadora He cleanses my Rainbow dash It hurts so much, but I do it for Engrapadora I can feel my rainbow dash being cleansed as my eyes start to water He roars a mighty neigh as he fills my rainbow dash with his cleansing juice. Recon walks in. Engrapadora looks him in the eye and says "Neeeigh." Engrapadora leaves through my window. Engrapadora is love, Engrapadora is life.
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5 RepliesNo! No more horse porn! Nubbin is our prophet!
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5 Replies
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1 ReplyNecrobump
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Church of badger ftw
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May Engra bless us all with the deity that is an equine mare.
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We are all but fgts when compared to Engra!
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1 ReplyBURN THIS THREAD TO THE GROUND!!!
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My Noiseless friends and I will burn this place to the ground.
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I find this church offensive and am butthurt and will now take you to court and sue your horse farm for believing something I don't
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The prophecy will be fulfilled!
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5 RepliesSomewhere engra smiles down.
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*tears up*
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Bump.
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He returns.
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Just passing by
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I'm pretty sure Engrapadora would love the ancient Epona woeshippers
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1 ReplyNecrowave
