*thousands of cargo planes fly over head and drop millions of gophers. They all parachute down*
English
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Call McRoy and see if he can make APC's with anti-aircraft cannons! We'll need them!
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*a thousand gophers parachute onto you and force you to the ground*
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I demand that you gophers take me to your leader immediately! I would know why you have attacked us.
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*they stare at you.* *they pick you up and carry you*
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I have to compliment you gophers. You have such feathery nice fur
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*they all make an odd sound* *you see some large amount of fur above the trees*
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Oh my
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*this...stares at you*
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Welcome to our settlement. I would like to know why your armies have attacked us. We are new here, having just left our old Dojo after it was attacked and I for one, meant you no harm.
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"ROOOOOAAAAAARRRR!!!!!"
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Does anyone speak gopher here?
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"ROOOOOAAAAAARRRR!!!!" *he steps closer to you*
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I offer it a large mix of carrots, peas, and sweet potatoes.
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*it looks at it.* *it falls face first on it*
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I'm so glad you liked it. I've heard rumors that there is a land far to west of here that is full of these crops
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*he stares at you* "ROOOOOAAAAAARRRR!!!!???"
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There is enough for you and all your gophers. And you have the added bonus of no pesky people to deal with.
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"ROOOOOAaaaAAAAARRRR!!!!" *he picks you up. Rubs you against him. Puts you down.* *a bunch of gophers come out of the hole and bring your a chest full of treasure* *the beast walks into the sunset and all the gophers follow him*
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I open the chest of treasures given to me by the gopher lord and find this armor. I put it on and decide that I look pretty good in it. I'll roll with it for now.
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*the gophers walk into the sunset*
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Farewell! May you and your colony prosper. *walks back to town*