What if everything you ever wanted...
WAS TO KICK SHIT IN THE FACE!? FOREVER!
[b]THEN YOU NEED[u] PEREGRINE GREAVES[/u]!!![/b]
PUT THESE[b] SWEET-ASS LEGS ON YOUR TITAN[/b] AND[b] YOU WILL F***ING DECIMATE THINGS WITH YOUR POWERFUL KNEES[/b]. THEY ARE[b] GEMS[/b]. YOU WILL LOOK [b]GLAMOROUS[/b] LIKE A [b]STYLISH LADY[/b] WHILE YOU [b]KNEE SOMEONE IN THE THROAT SO HARD THEIR TEETH GO FLYING OUT OF THEIR ASSHOLE![/b] YOUR LEGS ARE [b]BEDAZZLED! [/b]BEDAZZLED WITH THE[b] STRENGTH OF 1,000 KODIAK BEARS[/b] IF KODIAK BEARS GAVE[b] ZERO F***S[/b] ABOUT GRAVITY AND EVOLVED TO DO [b]SWEET JUMPKICKS! [/b]
YOU WILL SET YOUR CHILD ON YOUR KNEE TO GIVE HIM SOUND FATHERLY ADVICE AND[b] THAT CHILD WILL F***ING EXPLODE[/b] BECAUSE [b]YOUR KNEES ARE INSTANT DEATH![/b][b] YOUR SON WILL DIE! [/b]YOUR WIFE WILL DIVORCE YOU! [b]YOU WILL DIE ALONE ATOP THE MOUNTAIN OF CORPSES YOU'VE LEFT IN YOUR WAKE AS YOUR LIFE DISSOLVES INTO A NIGHTMARISH HELLSCAPE OF VIOLENCE AND DEPRAVITY! [/b]
YOU WILL[b] TAKE PEREGRINE GREAVES INTO THE CRUCIBLE [/b]AND YOU WILL[b] MASSACRE PEOPLE![/b] YOU WILL[b] F*** THEM UP![/b]
[b]YOU WILL KNEE BLADEDANCERS![/b] DENIED! [b]GET THAT BUTTERKNIFE THE F*** OUT OF HERE![/b]
[b]YOU WILL KNEE RADIANT WARLOCKS [/b]AND CAUSE THEM TO [b]WEEP RADIANT TEARS![/b]
[b]YOU WILL KNEE GOLDEN GUNSLINGERS[/b]...[b][i]CAREFULLY[/i][/b]....
[b]YOU WILL KNEE OTHER TITANS IN THEIR BUBBLES[/b], DIVING INTO THEIR[b] NEON DISCO DANCE PARTIES BLIND AS SHIT[/b] AND [b]MURDERING [/b]THEM WITH YOUR[b] ENERGY LEGS[/b]! IT IS[b] YOUR BUBBLE NOW SO FU*** THAT GU[/b]---wait, shit...[b]THE BUBBLE IS GONE BECAUSE OF YOU GODDAMMIT WHY THE F*** DID YOU DO THAT!? [/b]
YOU WILL[b] RUIN YOUR K/D[/b] LIKE I HAVE BECAUSE YOU ARE[b] ADDICTED[/b] TO THE SWEET,[i] SWEET[/i] SOUND OF [b]INSTANT AIRBORNE DEATH[/b]! YOU WILL CATCH SO MANY [b]SHOTGUN BLASTS TO THE FACE [/b]AND IT WILL BE [b]WORTH IT[/b] WHEN YOU [b]KNOCK A BLADEDANCER THE F*** OUT[/b] BEFORE HE CAN CHOP UP YOUR TEAM![b] EVERY PAINFUL DEATH WILL BE VALIDATED [/b]AS[b] YOUR LEG COLLIDES WITH A FIERY WARLOCK'S FAGGY GOAT HAT SO HARD THAT HE'S RENDERED BRAIN-DAMAGED[/b] AND HIS FAMILY[b] FIGHTS WITH THE STATE OF TEXAS[/b] TO [b]TAKE HIM OFF OF LIFE-SUPPORT! HE WILL LIVE OFF OF TUBES! BECAUSE OF[i] TEXAAAAAAS! [/i]
[/b]
[b]PEREGRINE[i] GREEAAAAAAAAAAVES[/i]!!![/b]
[b]EDIT:[/b] [b]YOU WILL KNEE TITANS PANIC-FISTING...and...[/b] shit. IT DOES [b]NOT END WELL[/b] IF "[b]UNSTOPPABLE[/b]" IS ACTIVE. THANKS, xSHIBBYx !
EDIT AGAIN: [b]I HAVE REVIEWED THE LORD OF WOLVES:[/b] https://www.bungie.net/en/Forum/Post/145107737/0/0
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Thank you so much for this.
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My enemies fear my TIGER KNEE!
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You like them then........ as do I :)
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I laughed so hard I cried!
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Your Capslock is broken
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Imagine those with airborne, arc burn, and brawler. They would kick crota off a cliff!
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Can't stop laughing. Classic.
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I be high jump kicking [spoiler]like hitmonlee[/spoiler]
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[b][i][u]YEEEEEEAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!![/u][/i][/b] [b][i][u]TESTOSTERONE INFUSED BOOTS WOTH SOME COCAINE AND MONSTER![/u][/i][/b]
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Phucking A man!!
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Reminds me of the peregrine greaves YouTube animated video, funny asf
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Feral For President!
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Feral. I hope someday Mr Torgue acknowledges you. Of all his illegitimate children your are by far the most awesome. Even more than antitorgue flexington and he suplexed an exploding volcano once.
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His mind... Poor child... So sad... Probably killed his f*cking parents with Peregrine Greaves H*LL YAH.....
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I dismantled them when I didn't have a Titan thinking they weren't shit.... -blam!- me
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SHOULDER CHARGE ME IN THE FACE! IN THE FAAAAAAAACE! DO IT! SHOULDER CHARGE ME IN THE FACE! FACE FACEFACEFACEFACE! NOW! ARC IN THE FACE! WANT EM! NEED EM! GIMMEGIMMEGIMME! AT THE SOUND OF THE BELL IT WILL BE FACECHARGING O'CLOCK! BONGGGGG! KNOCK KNOCK WHO'S THERE SHOULDER CHARGE ME IN THE FACE! END OF JOKE! I'M GONNA SING A SONG! SHOULDER CHARGE ME AT THE END OF IT! DA DA DA DA DA DA DA! BONG!! ...I NOTICE YOU HAVEN'T SHOULDER CHARGED ME IN THE FACE! CURIOUS AS TO WHY! Maybe you're weighing the moral pros and cons but let me assure you that OH MY GOD SHOULDER CHARGE ME IN THE GODDAMNED FACE!! WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR!?! IN THE FACE! NOT SO COMPLEX! NEED IT! WANT IT NEED IT HAVE TO HAVE IT! FACECHARGE! BOOM! BRAINS EVERYWHERE! Not the KNEE, not the ARM, not the SPINE - FACE! IT HAS TO HAPPEN! HNNNNG! FACEY FACEY FACE FACE! TIRED OF WAITING! NO MORE WAITING! NEED A FACE CHARGE! BOOM! SQUISH! YAY!
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You called?
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peregrin took
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Who else read this like mister torgue? XD
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"EVERY PAINFUL DEATH WILL BE VALIDATED ASYOUR LEG COLLIDES WITH A FIERY WARLOCK'S FAGGY GOAT HAT SO" I laughed too hard when I got to this part of your statement. I love this, I will put my armamentarium away for now and rock my greaves because of this and make sure I take down every fiery warlocks faggy goat hat down in your name. -from one titan to another
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Have you fellers seen how they light up when you jump while shoulder charge is ready? Some big blades stick out of your knees too.
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I'll take 10!!!
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Captain falcon style
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My favorite pat was the blue word: goat in the middle of some capitalized and bolded words.
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HOW MUCH?!
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Yes mate!