What if everything you ever wanted...
WAS TO KICK SHIT IN THE FACE!? FOREVER!
[b]THEN YOU NEED[u] PEREGRINE GREAVES[/u]!!![/b]
PUT THESE[b] SWEET-ASS LEGS ON YOUR TITAN[/b] AND[b] YOU WILL F***ING DECIMATE THINGS WITH YOUR POWERFUL KNEES[/b]. THEY ARE[b] GEMS[/b]. YOU WILL LOOK [b]GLAMOROUS[/b] LIKE A [b]STYLISH LADY[/b] WHILE YOU [b]KNEE SOMEONE IN THE THROAT SO HARD THEIR TEETH GO FLYING OUT OF THEIR ASSHOLE![/b] YOUR LEGS ARE [b]BEDAZZLED! [/b]BEDAZZLED WITH THE[b] STRENGTH OF 1,000 KODIAK BEARS[/b] IF KODIAK BEARS GAVE[b] ZERO F***S[/b] ABOUT GRAVITY AND EVOLVED TO DO [b]SWEET JUMPKICKS! [/b]
YOU WILL SET YOUR CHILD ON YOUR KNEE TO GIVE HIM SOUND FATHERLY ADVICE AND[b] THAT CHILD WILL F***ING EXPLODE[/b] BECAUSE [b]YOUR KNEES ARE INSTANT DEATH![/b][b] YOUR SON WILL DIE! [/b]YOUR WIFE WILL DIVORCE YOU! [b]YOU WILL DIE ALONE ATOP THE MOUNTAIN OF CORPSES YOU'VE LEFT IN YOUR WAKE AS YOUR LIFE DISSOLVES INTO A NIGHTMARISH HELLSCAPE OF VIOLENCE AND DEPRAVITY! [/b]
YOU WILL[b] TAKE PEREGRINE GREAVES INTO THE CRUCIBLE [/b]AND YOU WILL[b] MASSACRE PEOPLE![/b] YOU WILL[b] F*** THEM UP![/b]
[b]YOU WILL KNEE BLADEDANCERS![/b] DENIED! [b]GET THAT BUTTERKNIFE THE F*** OUT OF HERE![/b]
[b]YOU WILL KNEE RADIANT WARLOCKS [/b]AND CAUSE THEM TO [b]WEEP RADIANT TEARS![/b]
[b]YOU WILL KNEE GOLDEN GUNSLINGERS[/b]...[b][i]CAREFULLY[/i][/b]....
[b]YOU WILL KNEE OTHER TITANS IN THEIR BUBBLES[/b], DIVING INTO THEIR[b] NEON DISCO DANCE PARTIES BLIND AS SHIT[/b] AND [b]MURDERING [/b]THEM WITH YOUR[b] ENERGY LEGS[/b]! IT IS[b] YOUR BUBBLE NOW SO FU*** THAT GU[/b]---wait, shit...[b]THE BUBBLE IS GONE BECAUSE OF YOU GODDAMMIT WHY THE F*** DID YOU DO THAT!? [/b]
YOU WILL[b] RUIN YOUR K/D[/b] LIKE I HAVE BECAUSE YOU ARE[b] ADDICTED[/b] TO THE SWEET,[i] SWEET[/i] SOUND OF [b]INSTANT AIRBORNE DEATH[/b]! YOU WILL CATCH SO MANY [b]SHOTGUN BLASTS TO THE FACE [/b]AND IT WILL BE [b]WORTH IT[/b] WHEN YOU [b]KNOCK A BLADEDANCER THE F*** OUT[/b] BEFORE HE CAN CHOP UP YOUR TEAM![b] EVERY PAINFUL DEATH WILL BE VALIDATED [/b]AS[b] YOUR LEG COLLIDES WITH A FIERY WARLOCK'S FAGGY GOAT HAT SO HARD THAT HE'S RENDERED BRAIN-DAMAGED[/b] AND HIS FAMILY[b] FIGHTS WITH THE STATE OF TEXAS[/b] TO [b]TAKE HIM OFF OF LIFE-SUPPORT! HE WILL LIVE OFF OF TUBES! BECAUSE OF[i] TEXAAAAAAS! [/i]
[/b]
[b]PEREGRINE[i] GREEAAAAAAAAAAVES[/i]!!![/b]
[b]EDIT:[/b] [b]YOU WILL KNEE TITANS PANIC-FISTING...and...[/b] shit. IT DOES [b]NOT END WELL[/b] IF "[b]UNSTOPPABLE[/b]" IS ACTIVE. THANKS, xSHIBBYx !
EDIT AGAIN: [b]I HAVE REVIEWED THE LORD OF WOLVES:[/b] https://www.bungie.net/en/Forum/Post/145107737/0/0
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Rofl, bump.
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Anybody else hear the voice of Torgue (spelling?) from borderlands while reading this?
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ALRIGHT. [b]THERE WAS THIS ONE TIME IN THAT STUPID F*CKING 3V3 SH*T THERE WAS THIS BITCH TITAN WHO THOUGHT THAT HE WAS SAFE IN HIS BALLOON AND I GAVE HIM THE KNEE[/b]
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[b]NOW I WANT A PAIR! YOUVE CONVINCED MEEEEE![/b]
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I have a friend that mains a Titan and he is a complete Kodiak Bear with these! He is just a monster and an airborne assassin!!! People what the op is stating is no f*ucking joke! These exotic boots are for real! My friend has mastered these boots and now he is just unstoppable!
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[quote]YOU WILL KNEE TITANS PANIC-FISTING...and... shit. IT DOES NOT END WELL IF "UNSTOPPABLE" IS ACTIVE.[/quote] [spoiler]Please don't do this... We have enough trouble with the servers as it is. - Bungie[/spoiler]
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Powerthirst?
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Im sold, now i need these
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I can't stop laughing goddammit you get a bump.
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Worst exotic armor ever.. but then again Titan's are a fail in the Crucible.. just my opinion.. Idgaf
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I used them in ToO and this beauty of a match happened.
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I call them knee swords.
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[quote][b]GET THAT BUTTERKNIFE THE F*** OUT OF HERE![/b][/quote]
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Great Justice.
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I really want them because you can one shot the walker tank in the Taniks strike
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Was this narrated by..MR. TORGUE?!?
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They get even better with Arc burn.
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I read this in JonTron's voice.
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Did anyone else read this in a jeremy Clarkson like voice when seeing greaaaavess
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Nova Bump F'n hilarious man...
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This is hilarious!
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Torgue? Is that you?!
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It's Friday and it's funny == Friday Funny - seriously, hilarious!!!
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I was just gonna say this reminds me of Power thirst and started looking for it. Shit used to crack me the eff up when I used to smoke up. That and the End of Ze World
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Holy crap I'm in the middle of a flight and I'm laughing my ass off and everyone is looking at me. Please make this a thing, I need one on every exotic.
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Edited by LTCcherno: 8/7/2015 2:00:00 PMOh, is that yet another Bladedancer? Let me introduce him to my big O-Knee-Chan!!!