It tastes like rare candy, it'll help you level up! Then you can evolve into a captain!
English
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Captain? Ehhh I'd rather be vandal...I have a bad past with captains
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I'm almost positive that he was horny when he wrote this.
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Well no duh
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As I reread it I can't help but cringe more and more. This man needs Jesus.
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Really? I hear that they come in [i]handy[/i].