Sorry you're having bad experiences. It's a large issue to tackle that combines some very intricate social issues like addressing the way people behave while hiding behind anonymity, people maturing in this environment and the way it is affecting social skills, how to change this behaviour in a forum that is under regulated (both legally it is a very grey area and socially there are very few social ramifications for being a dick).
At this point all you can do is be selective of who you chose to play with, and report abusive players. Bungie has a system in place for this, and the more it is used, the more effective it will become.
Personally I don't usually play with people your age because our interests and perspectives tend to be very different, but I'm not a Jerk about it. Like you said, I was your age once and respect that at that time in my life we were quite similar and just excuse myself from the game and find one that is populated by people more in line with where I'm at. That being said I've found lots of young gamers who are very chill and are a pleasure to shoot things with.
Good luck, and never let the bastards get you down. There are lots of good people to play with.
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