[quote]For all other Tower High posts, you can find them all linked on the [url=https://www.bungie.net/en/Forum/Post/176176926/0/0]Overview Post[/url].[/quote]
[i]*The Tower High students are in the middle of Cryptology class with our friendly neighborhood Cryptarch.*[/i]
[b]Rahool[/b]: Alright class, how's everybody doing?
[i]*cricket sounds*[/i]
[b]Rahool[/b]: Is everyone totally pumped to Decrypt some engrams?!
[i]*Solis yells "you suck" in the background.*[/i]
[b]Rahool[/b]: Now now, I know that many of you think this is the most boring class of all time.
[b]Nightly[/b]: That's because it is.
[b]Rahool[/b]: Come now, you just have to look passed all the boredom! Cryptology is actually a very interesting study.
Here, let's try some decryption for today's warmup. Everyone take out your engrams that you all farmed for homework last night.
[b]-------------------
20 minutes later
-------------------[/b]
[i]The students are deep in concentration at their tables, examining their engrams very carefully.[/i]
[b]Storm[/b] [i](raising her hand)[/i]: Mr. Rahool, could you come take a look at this for me?
[b]Rahool[/b] [i](walking over)[/i]: Why, yes of course! I'd love to. What seems to be the problem?
[b]Storm[/b]: Well, you see, I found an exotic helmet engram last night, and I was wondering if you could help me out a little with this one? I figured such masterful hands could easily decrypt it into something.
[b]Rahool[/b] [i](nervously)[/i]: Oh, hehe. Why...um... Sure! I'd, uh, love to help!
[i]Storm gazes at Rahool.[/i]
[i]The pressure is on.[/i]
[i]Rahool begins looking at the engram.[/i]
[b]Storm[/b]: Well? Anything WRONG with the engram?
[b]Rahool[/b]: Not at all! Hehe...
[i]Rahool begins to sweat.[/i]
[b]Blades[/b]: PERSPIRING, Mr. Rahool? Are you NERVOUS?
[b]Rahool[/b]: No way! Lemme just get out my, uh, tools.
[i]Rahool reaches into his -blam!- pack for some tweezers, but his spaghetti spills out onto the floor.[/i]
[b]Rahool[/b]: Oh, er, my mother's spaghetti haha! I guess I must've left that in there last night.
[b]Strike[/b]: Pasta? You were decrypting engrams last night with pasta?
[b]Rahool[/b]: Oh no! I um... Here, let's get back to uh, decrypting this.
[i]Rahool returns his attention to the engram.
After about five or so minutes, Rahool makes his move.[/i]
[b]Rahool[/b]: Gotcha!
[i]The Cryptarch pulls the engram's core from the shell, finishing the final decrypting process.
A blinding white light shines all over the room. The students gaze at the decrypting engram, marveling at its beauty.[/i]
[b]Storm[/b]: Wow! I can't believe I'm gonna get my very own exotic helmet! My first one ever too! I wonder what my parents are going to say!
[b]Violet[/b]: Congrats Storm! I'm so happy for you!
[b]Sunny[/b]: Yeah, I wonder what you're gonna get!
[b]Flint[/b]: Hey guys, I think its almost done!
[b]Rahool[/b] [i](sweating harder with concentration)[/i]: Yup! Just a little more... Aaaaaand.... THERE WE GO!
[i]The light slowly fades away.
The students look over.
Lying in the Cryptarch's hand is a rock.[/i]
[b]Storm[/b]: ................
[i]Rahool places the rock in her hand.[/i]
[b]Rahool[/b]: I pity your enemies.
[b]Storm[/b]: ...............
[b]Rahool[/b]: You're a VERY lucky guardian. Use it well!
[b]Storm[/b]: But..... But I...... I.......
[i]The bell rings.[/i]
[b]Rahool[/b]: Haha, all in a days work. Don't forget, class, you have to do the reading on House Banners for homework tonight! I'll see you all on Thursday!
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Palms are sweaty, Moms spaghetti
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I lost it when the spaghetti fell out of his fanny, could hardly handle the rest [spoiler]these are too good[/spoiler]
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I knew there was gonna be a jab at engrams turning to shite
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Nice, you just got -blam!-ed
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LMFAO! Best one
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THIS IS THE BEST ONE SO FAR
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As I said before this needs to be an animated series.
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I cried at the elephant part
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Arms weak palms are sweaty, mom's spaghetti
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I think another class's helmet would've been a little better. Or turn it into a legendary helmet from the exotic engram.. that would've made me lol..
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Seriously? A baby elephant penis? You could've made it better by him decrypting a hunter or titan helmet instead of a warlock one.
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That's awesome
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So funny
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I DIED.
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I completely lost at "I pity your enemies" XD
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Bro your work is the best and funniest thing I have ever seen. Ever.
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This is pretty good
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These are amazing!! Im reading thru the trials ones right now!!
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Lol "oh i pity your enemies"
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Edited by I am Scr3aming: 12/5/2015 2:06:29 PMYour work [url=http://imgur.com/fqeEJfH]inspired me[/url], i is hope u liek
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As a Cryptarch, I approve
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I found this one later than usual. At first I was sorta getting lulled into suspense that I had nothing riding on so it wasn't too terribly entertaining. ...Then he decrypted the engram and I busted put laughing in the middle of the night(literally, not haha I guess that was funny, it was literally laughing out loud) Good job
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An decaying baby elephant penis. Great helmet Good job salamanderis
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Edited by Nero: 12/4/2015 1:50:41 AMYou. You're brilliant. I like you. [quote]I pity your enemies[/quote]