I've never told anyone my full story and for good reason too. I'm not looking for sympathy or apologies I just want to tell someone. This is gonna be a long one. Before I was born my mother as pregnant with a baby boy, but it resulted in a miscarriage. Afterwards I came into the picture. Because of the previous miscarriage my mother gave me everything I wanted so I could be happy. Along with that she didn't want me to get hurt or dirty so I barely ever was taken outside as a young child. Because I was given whatever I wanted and stayed indoors all the time it resulted in me becoming overweight. Come kindergarten I went to a local elementary school and on the first day my mother took me there and because she never took me anywhere outside and didn't know how to handle it she just left me there. Naturally I cried. In the result of me crying, I was taken to the principles office and the principle screamed at me for crying and telling me to grow up. So I was moved to a different elementary school. In the new school I stayed away from everyone because of my previous experiences. For a few weeks I would hide in the corner and wait until my parents came to pick me up from school. Eventually I slowly came out of the corner and started to talk. The only problem was that I was known as the crybaby because I hid in the corner for so long, so no one wanted to talk to me. But one of the kids there gave me a chance and became my first friend there. For kindergarten and first grade everyone slowly accepted me again but whenever second grade came along things changed. In second grade there was another kid. This kid was the first person since the kid in kindergarten to give me a chance. So I became friends with him. He was the disgusting and weird kid that never showered or brushed his teeth. So because I was friends with him and I was overweight I was bullied about it for years to come. Along with the bullying people with avoid me and spread nasty rumors about me and all that. Whenever middle school came I tried to cut off my ties with the kid from 2nd grade in an attempt to repair my image to my classmates but the damage has already been done. Around 6th grade my father find out that my mother had been cheating on him for years. So in the result my parents split apart and moved away from each other. So I was forced to live a week on week off schedule with my mother and father. After that she decided to look on MySpace for another boyfriend for some reason. The man she got with from MySpace lived in a city about an hour away from whereas my father lives so while I was still moving from house to house every week it became more difficult. My mother's new boyfriend turned out fine for about a month but after that me and my sister, who is 2 years younger than me, found out that he was a drinker and had tried to hit my mother on multiple occasions. Not very long after that he was arrested for drug abuse and attempted assault with a deadly weapon. After he went to jail me, my mother, and my sister moved into my grandmother's house for about a year. After that my mother decided to get together with the father of my friend from kindergarten. They stayed together for a year before my mother broke up with him because he took away all of mine and my sisters Christmas presents because he found out that mom hasn't divorced my father yet and he said it was wrong for her to do that. After my mother broke up with him we moved into another house that my mother had just recently bought at the time. She got another boyfriend and was with him for a year and a half. He was really cool and nice and not mean at all. But he got fired from his job and he didn't give my mother what she wanted because he didn't have any money because he got fired so she broke up with him. During middle school I made more friends than I had since then, but everyone still viewed me as the weird fat kid who was friends with they even weirder kid. In that result I became desperate for attention in my later year(s) of middle school, doing whatever any one told me to do. It did the exact opposite of what I thought it was supposed to do. Little did I know there was something coming that I was waiting to get there for years. High school. When my freshman year of highschool came I was hoping to make a new image of myself there in hopes of restarting everything from scratch in hopes to make new friends and maybe even a girlfriend at some point. Around that time my mother found one more boyfriend to keep around. This one was nice too, but was an asshole at times. About 3 months go by and my mother announced that she was getting engaged. Come to find out that the only reason why she got engaged so early was because she was seeing him while she had her boyfriends while she was still married to my father. So she got the divorce and got married. Every since my sister was born me and her have boob's nothing but disagree and fight. That's what normal siblings do, but she took it to a whole new level. She was the type of person who got really good grades but was really stubborn and rude. So everytime I tried to do something half decent she would insult and degrade me by telling me how much of a waste of space I am and how like would be better. While in highschool I tried many times to go on a diet to lose weight but with the way my schedule was with the week on week off with my mother and father, it's impossible to keep a consistent diet/workout schedule. So throughout my years in high school I remained overweight. In the second semester of my freshman year of high school I met this girl. This girl was the only girl I've made laugh and the only one I laughed at. I thought it was meant to be. So for the next year and a half all the way up to my first semester of my sophomore year I tried my hardest to get into a relationship with this girl. So I asked her out on a date and I got declined. In the event of that happening she decided to not talk to me for months and began liking one of my friends instead. I tried to get over it but she became friends with my other friends and because of that I had to see her every day. In the result of that I kept going through a torturous cycle of liking her and trying not to like her anymore. I couldn't do it so from the second semester of my sophomore year to the second semester of my junior year, which I'm in right now, I continued to attempt to create a relationship with her. It made progress and I really thought I was close but everytime I try to hint at or tell her that I like her she immediately either changes the subject or just simply hints at or tells me "no" and won't talk to me for the rest of the week. The highschool I'm going to at the moment is the type of highschool that just doesn't have the type of person you're looking for. So with that being these way it is, finding someone to have a relationship with is even harder, especially when you're overweight and shy. Along with my outside problemsI have, and I'm still having, internal religious problems as well. My entire family is extremely religious and have force fed the bible and religion in general down my throat to the point to where I just started to question my religious beliefs. So now I can't even talk religion and I have to lie to my family just so they won't be disappointed in me. So I'm caught between a rock and a hard place on wether or not to have faith in religion. And I have to go around every day putting on a fake smile for friends and family because it makes them happy. I'll be glad to do it because I know that if I'm not happy, then I'll at least help others to make their day a little better. That definantly helped me take a lot off of my chest. Thank you if you read the whole thing, but I'm not really expecting many people to read this since I'm currently writing this at 2:40 AM EST. As I said before I'm both looking for any sympathies or anything I'm just wanting to get it off of my chest because I've never told anyone. Thank you Edit: So far the comments have been extremely helpful and supportive. Thank you.