Ok, so let me tell you a story about my cousins. Well first of all, I should mention that they grew up on a farm where they had, you guessed it, pigs. Now my cousins were always a bit nuts. I mean they did crazy shit. For example, they would shoot each other with bb guns and set their sister's Barbie dolls on fire. Every time I went to visit, it was not unusual to see the driveway littered with disembodied Barbie limbs. Anywho, my cousins were also into aerospace engineering. They would build these crazy rockets which they would use to launch various objects into the sky. It pissed my uncle off when he kept running over these objects with the lawn mower. Well, one year, while I was visiting, they decided to do something extra crazy. You see, my uncle is not only a farmer, but he also welds a lot, which means he has a lot of oxygen tanks. My cousins, being the crazy geniuses that they were, thought it would be a fantastic idea to create rockets out of these tanks. So they, using very large hose clamps and adhesive, attached a come and fins to the tank and welded a makeshift launch rail. Now, let me give you an idea of how much pressure is in an oxygen tank. If you were to knock one over and break off the valve, it would fly around. I remember my dad telling me about how one broke loose at the company he worked for and thrust itself two feet deep into a concrete wall. That's a shitload of force. My cousins, obviously underestimated the thrust it would have. They used a huge sledgehammer to break the valve off and the tank immediately spat into the air and fizzled around. Now, there were some pigs nearby and the oxygen tank ended up doing a u-turn and headed right for them. The cone on the rocket impaled one of the pigs, creating a gutwrenching squelching noise. The pig of course squealed in agony as the rocket pinned it against the ground, before flipping over and carrying the pig into the air. It spiraled around the air as it headed into the sky, creating a pirouette of blood. Imagine filling a water balloon but not tying the end, and you throw it into the air. It spins around throwing water everywhere. That's kind of like the macabre scene. Well, the oxygen tank carried the pig over the tree line and out of sight. Now let me tell you that I was horrified. But my cousins thought it was hilarious, so of course they decided to do it again. Only this time they added a spike at the end of the cone and they purposefully aimed it at the pigs. They even went out of their way to draw little targets on the pigs. 10 points for the gut, 20 points for the rear, and 50 points for the head. They launched tank after tank at the pigs, laughing their asses off as the poor animals squealed into the air and out of sight. Now, we found out later that the neighbors were having a family reunion at their house. This meant there were dining tents set up as well as games for the children in the yard. This reunion was of course brought to an end when it was bombarded with pig missiles, that seemingly dropped out of the sky. Fortunately, nobody was physically hurt, but the children who had a disembodied pig head fall in the middle of their game of 4-square were traumatized for life. My cousins went to jail for several months and my uncle's business took a hit. But my uncle is resourceful. He used the reputation to his advantage, since his sons were the talk of the town. He changed the name of his farm to "Pigs can fly ranch" and even had a sign painted, showing pigs happily flying away on rockets. Oddly enough, this did wonders to improve his business.