I know the title may be inflammatory to some, so I'll start by saying I love the destiny community and usually have no issues.
Anytime I raid with a team that's over 50% strangers I always wind up getting kicked. Regardless of my K/d, light, dps or general wipe-causing--blam!-ups I'm always the one kicked.
Am I being paranoid? Or am I being penalized for bing a girl?
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I don't think this is just a problem for you it happened to me for a while as well back with vog. It's also happened in the division people are just morons. Just do the best you can at establishing a good group of friends who you can play with its what I did. But we don't raid due to none of us really caring and quitting the game for a while.