I would pay quite a bit for that. The lines that come to mind make me laugh. The snarking for dying would be excellent.
"Oh, dear. Looks like she's died.." *audible sigh* "..[i]again.[/i] Could someone help her up?"
"I feel like this would be going a touch better if only you didn't suck so desperately."
"Idiot down! ..Oops, I mean Guardian down!"
Maybe even one occasionally for the 'Darkness Consumes You' screen. Have her just softly singing in the background..
[i]"This was a failure..
I'm making a note here: Huge mistake.
It's hard to overstate my disappointment.."[/i]
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