First off, everyone watch the YMS review, it is definitely better than mine and goes more in depth.
Now, let us move into the horrific cringefest.
Unfriended was made last year or so and definitely took up my time by appearing on every single Youtube video I went on.
I thought it was going to be shit the second I saw the premise. I was already skeptical about this era's horror films since Paranormal Activity 4 had only one single remotely frightening scene in it and the only people running the horror movie business right were those involved with films like Crimson Peak.
So, of course, I never watched it in theaters. When the YMS review (part 1) came out, I decided to watch it for myself. This is when I went hunting, gained more viruses to break and modify, and photo-shopping SoFloAntonio's nose. I eventually found it and sat down for an hour to watch probably the second worst horror movie I have EVER SEEN!!
What happens is that all of these "characters" are in a skype call and the ghost of a girl named Laura Barns, who committed suicide a year ago (movie time), comes in and forces them to kill themselves, all leading up to the conclusion where we find out who the video of Laura Barns pre-suicide came from.
Now on to the characters:
[spoiler]Blaire; a dumbass who does not know how to computer and is girlfriends with Mitch.
Mitch; slightly smarter than Blaire who is boyfriends with her.
Adam; a stereotypical dick-biscuit who won't stop being a moron.
Jess; girl
Val; the girl nobody likes.
Ken; the fat nerdy hacker kid who is OK I guess.
Laura Barns; the best character of the movie, a little cringey until she becomes a ghost, where she is smarter, faster, stronger, and all around me if I was a ghost.[/spoiler]
Besides the forced parts of it and none of the characters being relatable, the scare factor is non-existent. I was never scared, even when the jumpscare at the end happened. The deaths just made me laugh because of how ridiculous they felt. Let us get on to that, shall we?
The first character who really dies is Laura Barns herself, who commits suicide.
The second was Val, who just stood there with a bottle of Bleach next to her, which I am going to assume she drank since it was open. She did what I wanted to do while watching the film.
Next was Ken, who blends himself, he sticks his hand into a blender and then his neck. Lol
Next was Adam, who turned his gun on himself when the morons that are the protagonists told Blaire to reveal a paper that said, "If you show this paper, Adam will die," seriously what the -blam!-.
Next was Jess, who stuck a hairdryer down her throat.
Next was Mitch, who stabbed himself... ow.
Finally, Blaire got jumpscared.
The characters made me want to die, they were that bad. None of them, except Laura, made me feel anything, and even then Laura only became good when she was a ghost. This was just horrible m8.
I- I'm done, I am just going to cry some more about how a girl actually likes me, thus breaking my forever alone rule and making me wonder why since I am such an asshole.
This movie gets a 4/10.
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*sniff* *sniff* That sounds like some cringy shit