First off, Very sorry for your loss and you have my sympathy. I lost a wife, a brother and two aunts this year. The only words I can give you are that "this to shall pass.." You will learn to celebrate her again in time but until then you grieve any way you see fit and whatever helps you get though it. Just put on your thick skin when its on the internet. But even here there is far more good being sent your way then bad so use it and move forward everyday little by little. Remember nothing on this planet has every truly died. We are all star dust and energy and when we move on to whatever is next we simply give ourselves back to creation for another round of different life. Good Luck in all you do