Relax people. We're all just being Punk'd (yes people still say that) by Bungie.
This extremely vanilla, not even vanilla, vanilla extract, D2 experience was all done on purpose.
They took this game to the point of vanilla extractedness (yes that's a word, cuz I typed it) in order draw the "casuals" into the labyrinth of Destiny.
Once the hook is in their collective mouths they'll set it with a cornucopia of content the likes of which the gaming world has never seen!
There will be all of the D1 content, along with the D2 content, plus a little D3 content sprinkled in all Nusret Gökçe style for good measure. #SaltBae
There will be 31 new planets/moons to explore in various galaxies including a raid on a Halo thanks to a surprise collaboration between Bungie, 343 & Microsoft!
Master Chief will make a special appearance at The Tower where he and Zavala will hold a charity arm wresting event 'Over the Top' style to raise money for children orphaned in the Ghaul attack.
There will be a love triangle side story involving Failsafe, Cortana, and ghost that will turn very ugly and lead to a spinoff mobile app device game in the vein of Angry Birds meets Words with Friends.
There will be machine guns and Gjallarhorns and Suri (plural of Suros, little known fact) and even a Needler or two.
There will be actual farming AT The Farm. Think Harvest Moon.
There will be tons of replayability and fun... so much so that people will forget the meaning of the word salt in terms of forum posts #OnHere.
So everybody calm down, take a deep breath, do some virtual yoga and namaste out a bit.
Bungie's got this whole thing under control. They've had it all in the works from the beginning, like George Lucas..................
They are so in command of this whole shebang I hear every guardian even gets his/her own shark with frickin lasers on their frickin heads. That's how frickin evil the frickin genius of these frickin guys frickin is!
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My thoughts exactly! 😂