*It is Friday, the day before spring break in the tower...12 minutes into the history class... The students are becoming restless...wondering where their substitute is.* •Johnny: You don’t think the teacher got lost do you? •Carrie: Maybe he did, wouldn’t matter since he’s a dumbass. -EXCUSE ME?! *Tiger climbs through the window and slithers to the desk, obviously in a hangover* -Alright you little -blam!-s! Time for class! And trust me when I say it... *Drinks the rest of his Jaeger Beer* ...Your asses better be ready for the test soon. *The students get out their notebooks* -Now starting with the homework. The correct answer to last weeks homework as the Dust Palace, where the psion flayers tried to get freaky with Rasputin. Now, onto today’s lesson you dumb students. THE HIVE. [i][b]Background:[/b][/i] The hive are more complicated than a matrix plot thread. Ya see- •Johnny: Sir? What’s the Matr- -SHUT THE -blam!- UP! Anyways, from what I heard before Eris decided to leave, was that Oryx, Sava-B<tch and Xivu Arath were all once female. Through acts of killing each other, they grew to love each other more (what a -blam!-ed up family). Eventually, sh€t happened, Oryx got a gender transplant, killed something called a Worm god, was able to gain the ability to take, blah blah blah...Eventually, his sisters disappeared, only for Oryx to make his throne world, a giant ass Ship. You see, when a Hive dies in the physical realm, hey journey to something called the ascendant realm. Only there can they be truly killed. Oryx made it into the Dreadnaught. “A literal paradox” as a “know-it-all” warlock once put it. Eventually, Oryx got knocked up, had a few kids, including Crota. The bane of light. This is one right son of a bitch I ain’t gonna diss. Crota came to the moon and infested it. For years, his spawn has terrorized us, murdered us, and so on. As the monsters they are, they worship the darkness. That’s what makes them so deadly. They can drain your light so much easier than anything else could. To them, this isn’t just a struggle. It’s a goddamn crusade. [i][b]Biology[/b][/i] On first glance, it’s easy to mistake the hive for bugs. But that’s actually party true. When looking at a Knight for example, they seem to be more crustacean than bug. Kinda like a lobster. But the bug elements are still there. They create breeding grounds which allow the Hive to quickly gestate any form of assholes they choose. Thralls, acolytes, you name it. Even the goddamn Witches (not wizards. Wizards are male! The wizards of the hive are female!) of the hive seem to fly around, ever so slightly, like a bug. They also have three eyes. The purpose of these three eyes is unclear, but they are scary to look at when in the dark. *Grabs another beer and starts drinking it* [i][b]Weapons:[/b][/i] Now, *BURP*, the weapons are even harder to understand... *Johnny raised his hand* -Oh goddamnit.. what?! •Johnny: Teacher isn’t it illegal to drink in the classroom? And swear? -Listen, and shut up! *Throws Johnny our the window* -Anyway, the hives weapons seem to be more magic based than technology based. I’ve tried myself. These things seem to take any form of energy (mostly void and arc) and are shot through specialized husks. Sometimes, these husks are used for sentries. Aka, -blam!-ing shriekers. [i][b]Ranks of the hive[/b][/i]: Thrall: Deadly in large numbers. Bring shotguns. 2/10 when solo thralls are around. 7/10 when completely surrounded Acolyte: Small foot-soldier. 3/10 Knight: Toughest son of a bitch you’ll ever see. 6/10 Witch (NOT WIZARD): Take them out, preferably with solar weapons. Ogre: Enormous threat. Neutralize immediately. 7/10 Now these ranks are based on basic enemies. The hive has multiple ranks for different powerful beings. Should you encounter one, like Crota for example, bring a dependable Fireteam. Or run. No shame in running. [i][b]Tips when fighting the hive:[/b][/i] -As stated above, sometimes it’s best to run away, and let them come to you. -Bring solar and arc weapons. Knights sometimes are arc shielded, and wizards (damnit they’re witches!) are solar shielded. -The Hive are all about getting up in your face. Recommend sub machine guns, auto rifles, swords, and shotguns. -For the love of god, DONT, LET, THEM, FINISH A SPELL! They might be able to kill you! Now that wraps up today’s lesson. The homework for over the break is this. “Finish the name of this Hive Knight. ________, fanatic of Crota” And for god sakes... I NEED MORE BEE- AGGGGGGHHHHH!!!! *Falls out the window*