The rain poured onto Vici, a small town which lay close to the borders of the Empire. The village was notorious for bounty hunters coming through, seeking their next job. Beasts, demons, monsters and the like lurked in the forest just a couple miles away, perfect for men searching for exotic wares. The town was known to few, however, for its fair share of runaway criminals. The truly great hunters did not speak of the frequent escapees, if one was lucky he could bring multiple corpses to the state with one trip. With all this being said, it was a frightened town, and who could blame them? They could just as easily be slaughtered by malicious creatures as they could pillaged by a large band of robbers. The Empire of which they were a part appeared cold and distant to them, either unable or unwilling to project its might in protection of these citizens. Bounty hunters offered such protection, but rarely at a price these poor souls could afford. In their eyes, despite the many around them, they were alone.
However, it just so happened that on one particular day one particular bounty hunter came into the town looking for one particular escaped murderer who had fled a fortnight prior. This hunter was named Liam Gue. He donned plate armor, carried a sword and dagger at his side, and rode a black horse. On his blue and yellow armor was the sigil of a lion, fitting for a man roaming what he acted was his territory. The man whose head the hunter had been sent to retrieve was a former Praetorian, a member of the royal guard of the late Emperor. As such few were skilled enough to kill him. Let alone well equipped. However, despite being at an apparent disadvantage, the huntsman strode into the town to bring this murderer’s head to the Senate and to the new Emperor, Tarquin Maridius.
As Liam entered the town, he received no glances from the other inhabitants. The bounty hunters, however, were clearly speaking of him, admiring his gear. The convicts also talked among themselves, wondering if a new garrison was arriving soon. As the hunter went further into the town, he found himself in the market. Lining the street were small stands, bruised fruits and vegetables filled their baskets. Dogs barked as he approached, while merchants offered him their goods for higher than normal prices. He paid them no mind, he was set on finding the inn. If asked about his business he would say he was but a weary warrior, eager for a mug of ale and some warm food. As he passed through the market and into the rest of the town, he noticed a couple of robbers holding a knife to a man’s throat. They were demanding any coin he had, the villager swore he had nothing. Of course they didn’t believe him. The robbers harassed him until he gave in, causing the poor devil to collapse onto the ground in fear. The hunter simply moved along. “There will be another time.” He thought to himself.
Shortly after, the hunter found the inn. The sign above its door was nigh unreadable, had it not been for a couple drunkards stumbling into the street, he may very well have missed it. Liam dismounted his horse and found a post to tie it down to. He grabbed a small pouch of money out of his saddlebag to pay for his supper and entered the establishment. Upon opening the door, he was greeted with a loud din of people talking to each other and yelling for more ale to the bartender. After scanning the room, the hunter found a small table on the other side where he could sit. As he went to take his seat, a man by the bar caught his eye. He seemed to be hiding himself, hunched over his drink and in a large coat. A moment later a boy no older than 16 came to him asking for his order. “Whatever is most popular.” The hunter replied. The boy nodded and turned to go towards the kitchen, but he doubled back towards Liam.
“I hope ya don’t mind me asking, but what is a legionnaire such as ya doin’ in this town?” The young lad inquired.
“Just passing through, looking for some warm food and some drink to quench my thirst. How did you know I was a legionnaire?”
“I just noticed that lion on ya shoulder plate an’ thought I’s ask.” The boy paused and looked at the hunter’s side. “Mind if I saw your blade?” Liam nodded and unsheathed the sword. “Mighty fine steel ya got there.”
“It is. This sword is lighter, stronger, and sharper than anything I used before it.” Liam himself was admiring the blade now. “In fact, I’ve never had to sharpen it in all the time I’ve had it.”
“How’d ya get it?” The boy asked.
“The late Emperor heard from my general that I had performed an act of great valor. So, he rewarded me with this, designed after the sword my father had passed down to me. Simple, but nevertheless beautiful.” He sheathed the hand-and-a-half sword. Liam paused a moment, “When did the man at the bar wearing the coat arrive here?” He asked.
“‘Bout 2 days ago. Got a room here an’ hasn’t stepped outside since.”
“Thank you. Now, about my supper...”
“Oh yes, right away sire!” The boy then hurried to get him his meal. With all preoccupations out of the way, Liam looked over to the man who had caught his attention earlier. His eyes were glued to the stranger’s every movement. How his leg was impatiently bobbing up and down, his glances to his right and left, his fingers constantly drumming on the bar top. What truly roused the hunter’s curiosity was when the man drank. He was being cautious no doubt, he barely lifted his hand, but his drink had been slowly emptied to the point where the sleeve of the coat fell but slightly. As it did, a slight shimmer of gold could be seen on the stranger’s wrist. Not that of a band or any such jewelry.
Liam approached the bar, a vacant stool stood next to the now suspect man. The bartender opened his mouth to ask for his drink, the hunter simply raised his hand to prevent his speaking. The boy to whom Liam had conversed with earlier exited the kitchen with his food, despite his youth he had seen enough to know it was best to move on as though his patron had not moved places on him. The hunter looked over to the man out of the corner of his eye, attempting to hide the fact that he was intently studying him as he watched. He noticed the beads of sweat dappling the man’s temple, his taking of long, uneasy breathes, and his fingers tightly gripping the mug.
“I saw your blade, fine weapon...” the stranger spoke to the huntsman suddenly. “Especially for that of a legionnaire.”
“Thank you.” Liam slowly placed his hand on the hilt of his dagger. “Do you have... experience with the army?” He asked hesitantly.
“More than enough.” He replied. For a few moment there was a chilling silence. To the huntsman it felt like hours. With each passing second the tension grew exponentially. Moreover, Liam’s anxiety was increased as he did not want to strike down someone he was not certain was who he was looking for. Again, the man spoke. “The Senate hired you to kill me?”
“I beg your pardon?”
“Shame... your naïveté had you trust them. And your trust will have you killed.” After the stranger spoke this his arm lunged toward the hunter, palm outstretched to reveal a hidden wrist blade. The steel was quickly parried by Liam’s own, the dagger he carried at his side had been close at hand for such a situation. However, the Praetorian backhanded the hunter, causing him to stumble back for a moment. It was brief but it was enough time for the former Emperor’s guard to leave the inn and draw his sword. Liam quickly met him outside with his own blade drawn.
(Continued in the comments)
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This is great, but i have two criticisms (kinda). The first is just grammar stuff; in the secind paragraph, there's a part where it says, "Few were skilled enough to take him down. Let alone well equipped," (That's not the exact quote but whatever). The second sentence in that phrase is a fragment, and therefore grammatically incorrect. Simply replace the period with a comma and the tiny issue will be solved. The second is also really minor and nitpicky, but i figured i better mention it. In the second paragraph in the comment section of the story, there's a description that goes somrthing like, "Liam attempted to stain his sword red with the Praetorian's blood, but it was swiftly parried..." (Again, not exact quote, but i think you know what i'm talking about.) This piece of imagery is very pretty and very descriptive, but it induces an image in the reader's head that is contrary to what is actually going on. That "stain his sword red with blood" part makes the reader think of a bloody sword, but, in that moment of the story, Liam hadn't killed the guy yet. This creates a tiny bubble of hesitation as the reader has to untangle the contradictory image and the true events in the story. It's a very slight hesitation; it took me only a moment to shake off the confusion, but that moment slightly interupts the flow of the story, which you don't want. Great story though, the descriptions and imagery were top-notch, and it had a very episodic ending where the immideate conflict was resolved but hinted at a greater conflict. I can go about my day without wondering what's going to happen next, but, if you do post the next part, i will be excited to see what new tribulations appear in the world of Liam Gue.