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12/30/2025 6:04:03 AM
21
Grieving hard rn
My 15 year old nephew Scotty took his life on Christmas eve. My life is shattered. I dont know where to go. I considered him my little brother, I was 10 when he was born. He loved to play destiny w me.
Anybody have any advice in a situation like this? Tired but cant sleep. Breathing but suffocating. This pain is unimaginable. Does this ever get better?
English
#destiny2
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2 RepliesEdited by SpoonieEzMode: 12/30/2025 7:12:35 AMI see you, I hear you, I witness. My sister passed last year, about this time. If I think too hard about the circumstances, I go incandescent. But burning myself to a cinder isn't going to serve her memory, or get her justice, so...I breathe. Grieve, and feel it. Healing is not linear, for the love of all the gods don't ask ChatGPT, go find some humans to talk to. That app is cursed and I'd rip it out of every phone with my bare hands if I could. We NEED people, in all our awkwardness and frustration, in all our messiness and imperfections. We've all lost someone. We know. A friend of mine says that grief is an ambush predator, waiting for you in the supermarket baked bean aisle when a certain song comes on. It's a -blam!-, and it WILL catch you up in public places. It will anger you and embarass you...and that's okay. Let the tears fall. Eventually, you'll realise you do have to get up in the morning and make something to eat. It will stop feeling so ridiculous that the sun is shining (how DARE it???), and that your heart is still beating. I hope you get to a point where you realise you have a whole life ahead of you to live, to cram with experiences so you can tell them what you've been up to when your time comes, and you won't be in a hurry to meet your time, because you've got SO much more to see and do. Give yourself time. Give yourself grace. We need less Dredgen Baels in the world. Pain is a part of life, but there's no reason to turn it without, or turn it within. We find purpose between the bright places where pain cannot reach, because life has always been hard, but our ancestors found a way to keep moving and keep living in spite of it. I am here, if you need someone to speak to. I have no great wisdom...but I know pain, and how to keep going, one foot after the other.
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Edited by Scourged One: 1/1/2026 9:45:42 PM[quote]My 15 year old nephew Scotty took his life on Christmas eve. My life is shattered. I dont know where to go. I considered him my little brother, I was 10 when he was born. He loved to play destiny w me. Anybody have any advice in a situation like this? Tired but cant sleep. Breathing but suffocating. This pain is unimaginable. Does this ever get better?[/quote] Hey man, I'm sorry to read this. My wife took her own life after struggling with alcoholism for her entire life. The pain hits less as time goes on, and you'll be able to remember the good times without wanting to cry after a while, but the hurt never fully goes away. My father also passed away New Years Eve, 2 years ago. After a bad fall that really messed him up Christmas morning..., he was elderly and falls aren't good for elderly people 😞
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It will get better with time, but even then, grief has a weird way of sneaking up on you, even on your best day. I know sleeping is hard, but at the very least, try to stay nourished and hydrated. Earlier this year I chose the route of no food, no sleep (bad dreams) and broke my 8 months of sobriety. That was in May. I just quit heavily drinking again on the 26th. It was what I justified as a necessary distraction, but I definitely spiraled. Don’t spiral. Especially downward. I wish you nothing but better days ahead.
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I’ve lost people through sudden death and suicide and it’s never easy to deal with. The pain and emptiness it leaves behind is something that only heals with time but I regret to inform you it never completely goes away. I’ll be out walking my dogs and an old memory will come back to me and I’ll find myself wiping my tears for a minute or two. With suicide there’s the thought of is there something I could’ve done? Could I have intervened? But the truth is there’s nothing you could do because most people who take their own life usually hide their emotions and feelings very well and disguise any pain or internal conflict they may be feeling. My own cousin took his life after ending a relationship but the week before we were out having a beer and there were no warning signs or anything, he was the same old same old, full of life and energy, cracking jokes and laughing but a week later he was gone. All I can say is take each day as it comes, it’s going to be rough I won’t lie about that and speak to your folks about it. Start a conversation with each other, it’ll help share some of the emotional burden and if other family members open up to you about their own feelings and share whatever they’re going through it’ll do a lot of good for the both of you.
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Your brain must be racing. You could try writing him a letter. Might help you a little bit, especially if you're not the talking kind. My condolences either way. Hang in there, stranger.
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If you can get yourself into a therapist ASAP and to some form of grief counseling in the meantime you'll be doing yourself and your family wonders. Holidays make such losses even harder to tolerate. Lost a family member to suicide last year. My family is still trying to recover let alone his own children. But please talk to a close family member to help you look into some of the things suggested. So sorry for your loss fellow guardian and human being.
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1 ReplyHe may be lost to your sight but you are not lost to his. He has stepped beyond the Veil. Out of the dream. Hold his memory with love in your heart. Release the pain of loss. It does not serve you. Love and fear traverse the void. Positive or negative. Energy moving. Choose love. He will be grateful if you only remember his strengths. Eyes up guardian!
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you need anything just message me okay We are here for ya dude
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Depends what country you are in, but contact a local grief councillor and or mental health professional. Nobody here is qualified to help you over a forum.
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You have to go through it; but you can't force it to be better.
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Just know you're not alone. It may feel like it, but you're not. It gets better, but it takes time. This song helped me cope. Its about exactly what you described, but, it helped me stay resilient. https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=XlScrMv7Pd8
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From someone who has lost a lot of friends, one under the same circumstance, it does get easier as time goes on. There will always be that pain though. You just have to try and focus on the time they were here and not how their time ended. Don't try and get through this on your own. You need to not keep it bottled in. Talk with your friends and your family or if necessary, a professional. Eventually you'll smile when thinking about them. Eyes up, guardian.
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Edited by BetweenMyself: 12/30/2025 6:28:23 AMI’m sorry to read about your tragic loss. As it is likely difficult to discuss your feelings with your immediate family when everything is this raw, you may want to look into getting in contact with someone that counsels loss survivors such as yourself. Here are a variety of links I found with a quick search: https://afsp.org/ive-lost-someone/ https://allianceofhope.org https://www.save.org/programs/suicide-loss-support/ https://www.taps.org/suicide I’ve never experienced this type of loss myself, but I hope you and your loved ones find your way to healing and closure in time. Eyes up, Guardian. (΄◉◞౪◟◉｀)
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Sorry for your lost. 🙏 My condolences to you and your family during this difficult time.
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My mother took her own life several years ago. The pain remains, but time softens it. Remember the good times you shared. I’m sorry for your loss.
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I’d suggest doing a little research on grief counseling/family counseling. There are a ton of great resources and people out there that can help you get started on healing with the right tools and mindset. 🙌🏻 Eyes up guardian
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1 ReplyA toxic games forum isn't the best place to ask. Am.sorry for the loss. Look for a local organistion that has people that help deal with grief 😔
