Place it under civil union so gay couples can share in the benefits as other heterosexual couples that also had opted for civil unions. This also protects the belief structures of embedded religious institutes and faith based populations that feel they too are being victimized by their beliefs being compromised to fit societal shifts. Marriage is a term that holds a certain place in binding under the doctrines of a religion, only now Governments are also using the term. It's not easy to be a Christian or Catholic or Muslim as in example of all major religion throughout the human experience on earth. There are set rules in place that define these cultures of belief. Live by it or leave it. Conforming to societal whims depending on each new generation is not what defines these historical institutes. Instead it is that they are set under their laws and instructions, which they see as edicts by God that set them apart and define them on inherit beliefs. The Gay community like many others who fall on the wrong side of these tones will simply have to form their own churches and large active communities to change policy and influence law makers to achieve their long term goals. So long as marriage is used as the term over civil union it will chafe those who feel as if their values and belief are under direct siege to be compromised and redefined. And if you can redefine and change one part then it's an easy slide down hill to loss of identity core to who you are as a group and what defines you.