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This thread is inspired by another: view original post
4/13/2013 3:33:39 AM
217
Things you wouldn't want to hear an airplane pilot say
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*While in the plane* "Hey joe? How do you turn off the airplane?"
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2 Replies"This is your captain Osama Bin Laden speaking"
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"There goes the radar. My circuits are toast." "The electrical system's all messed up. The canopy won't blow." The ejection seat's probably not working, either." "There's the stadium. I'm dropping the plane over there."
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"Look at that stadium, now look at me, now back to the stadium now back to me... I'm not that stadium... I'm just ramming into it"
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Edited by Jono: 7/20/2013 6:47:57 AM"Erik, Baleog, Olaf, come in? Must've gotten lost again."
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Nothing while something bad is happening.
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JStreet: We are now approaching pie next to the pie Blonic: Blolks we are blow approaching the black blesa, oh blod. What's that blexplosion?!
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1 Reply"im a muslim with radical views."
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1 ReplyOnce when I worked on the medical helicopter I had a pilot suddenly shout, "Oh shit!" I thought I was going to die. Apparently the problem was a compass heading...In my opinion a pilot should never yell "Oh shit" over a compass heading.
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"Ok folks we're going to be experiencing some turbulence". "Some" always ends up being a lot. For 45 minutes. At night.
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"What's that supposed to do?"
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"Hey, copilot: did we refuel before we took off?" "Hey, copilot: is that red light supposed to be blinking?" "Hey, copilot: should the two left engines be smoking like that?" "Hey, copilot trainee: fly for me, I'm going to take a nap."
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I once had a Chinese flight attendant who got on the intercom, and I shit you not I swear it was Osama Bin Laden on the PA that day.
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1 Reply*Hears repeated grunting from cockpit.*
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1 ReplyI coherent sentence. That means he's not a real pilot.
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"Hey, check this out."
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We will not arrive on time.
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"Thank god we're flying, i'm too pissed to drive."
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"Shit, spilled my beer!"
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Edited by MoonDawg: 4/16/2013 6:42:14 AM"Pull up! Pull up! ... You did that on purpose, didn't you?"
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"What does this thing do?"
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We're going down!!!... on your mother tonight.
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"Game Over Man! GAME OVER!"
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Edited by Arky: 4/14/2013 3:41:19 PM"Well, I've played a pilot on tv. Really, how hard could it be?"
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I think I can fly this plane with my dick. Almost worked last flight.
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"PREPARE FOR RAMMING SPEED!"
