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7/13/2014 2:23:04 AM
26
so theres this girl...
salutations, flood. the lizardo is back with a 100% true girl problem!
so i was feeling pretty depressed lately with my decreased success with women, and decided, well, maybe i should give it another try. so i log onto jdate, and i get a match! we go out, have a reasonably-priced meal and go home and make efficient love. i'm back in the game baby! so we keep dating for a few weeks... and i decide that this is the woman i want to spend the rest of my life with. i want to be beside this woman forever. and i never want to let her go. so that's when i decided to surgically attach myself to her. of course, this is a decision i didn't take lightly. this takes a lot of practice and medically-trained doctors with just a hint of madness. so i did it myself. you know, tight on cash n shit. well i thought i did a pretty good job, but apparently not good enough. now she's dead. i got a dead woman on the side of me, and i don't know what to do. if i try to scrape her off, her parents might get pissed and i might die. if i don't, shame and embarrassment for life.
what do i do, flood?
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2 RepliesIt's hilarious how every single one of this retarded ass threads starts off with "so I was feeling depressed."
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2 RepliesSee This is because you didn't use eHarmony
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Name her wilfred.
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1 ReplySure feels like Bungie.old with all the girl threads
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4 Replies[quote]with a 100% true girl problem![/quote] [quote]i decided to surgically attach myself to her.[/quote] It was all in your head Lizardo. None of this is real.
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I'm glad I actually read this "girl thread", it's unlike any other I've encountered.
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He was a boy And she was a girl Can I make it any more obvious?
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1 ReplyGrab her eyes and fap. [spoiler]*drinks battery acid*[/spoiler]
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Get her pregnant get married stop having bitch problems and get man problems
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2 RepliesJust deflate her and throw it away.
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5 RepliesWhy do you keep killing your women? ._.
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"I really always knew that my little crime would be cold. That's why I got a heater for her thighs. " The story of lizardo.
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4 RepliesEdited by Dididak: 7/13/2014 9:10:05 AMBurn her off with a blowtorch, works every time. Plus, the remains are cremated for the parents. [spoiler]unless you like the taste of ashes[/spoiler]
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3 Replies
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3 RepliesWtf online dating..?
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Are you serious?!?!? [spoiler]JDate?!?!?[/spoiler]
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Edited by Dill Pickle: 7/13/2014 2:29:44 AM[quote]salutations, flood. the lizardo is back with a 100% true girl problem! so we keep dating for a few weeks... and i decide that this is the woman i want to spend the rest of my life with. i want to be beside this woman forever. [/quote] That's when I knew something would go horribly wrong
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Chain saw
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2 Repliestl;dr Summarize it in 6 words, you fking fgt.
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3 RepliesKill her.
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Ah, fire always works.
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5 RepliesPersonally, I have no relationship experience whatsoever, never dated a girl in my life. But, I can tell you this, do what you think is best. But if you really need advice right now, I say if you fall in love with another girl in your life, then you should move on to her.
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1 ReplyYour only solution is to dress her up as a ninja so nobody can tell she's there.
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1 Replyum yeah what Gandalf said
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4 RepliesFuçk her right in the pussy!
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[quote]what do i do, flood?[/quote]fap.
