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OffTopic

Surf a Flood of random discussion.
7/13/2014 2:23:04 AM
26

so theres this girl...

salutations, flood. the lizardo is back with a 100% true girl problem! so i was feeling pretty depressed lately with my decreased success with women, and decided, well, maybe i should give it another try. so i log onto jdate, and i get a match! we go out, have a reasonably-priced meal and go home and make efficient love. i'm back in the game baby! so we keep dating for a few weeks... and i decide that this is the woman i want to spend the rest of my life with. i want to be beside this woman forever. and i never want to let her go. so that's when i decided to surgically attach myself to her. of course, this is a decision i didn't take lightly. this takes a lot of practice and medically-trained doctors with just a hint of madness. so i did it myself. you know, tight on cash n shit. well i thought i did a pretty good job, but apparently not good enough. now she's dead. i got a dead woman on the side of me, and i don't know what to do. if i try to scrape her off, her parents might get pissed and i might die. if i don't, shame and embarrassment for life. what do i do, flood?

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