'Wake me when you need me' - the infamous last words of second son, Lord Darude, master of all creation, upon having spawned Sandstorm into the desert's of Tatooine, within which a young ogre named Jabba, lost heir of the fabled swamp of Oblivion dwelled, he looked off one day to the rim of the sky and whispered to himself 'Shrek is love...Shrek is life'..the sun drifted behind a cloud as he faded out of consciousness into a glorious hallucination in which he owned all the merchandize and prayed to salad fingers every night, his rusty spoon collection was almost complete, he wants to please salad. 404 error, shrek not found, the ogre was awoken from his slumber due to lack of Shrek, he roared a mighty roar as he filled his blam with his love. All of a sudden, there shined a shiny sloth, in the middle of the swamp, and he said 'play the best song in the world, or I'll eat your soul' sadly, this was the day that ogres soul was eaten, his power level was just simply not over 9000 as it so needed to be...as his soul was devoured he stated with his dying breath 'I'll put mah deck in the owl'..the sloth kindly advised him against such an act from having found it to have been a bad move when he himself tried it at a younger age...and just like that...it was all ogre....but it's never ogre. Out of nowhere came Bill Gates in flash of light, 'in the name of Microsoft, stop right there EA!' The sloth was stunned...it turned to face Gates 'ahh you touch my trahlahlah...mmm my ding ding dong..' It whispered, Gates transforms into Darude and begins to play sandstorm on a wooden pipe as money begins to fly around him, Sloth EA is unable to withstand this unrelenting force, as if the voice of dragons themselves were shouting him apart, he was cloaked in storms as he is consumed by the darkness...he used to be a troll like Chief, then he made a blue AI chick a promise he couldn't keep....and this was the tale, of Captain Jack Sparrow, pirate so brave, with a jar of dirt...des- the great journey awaits P.S. the fox said you shall not pass, now to drive into the sunset in me mums car..