I've been in a situation where my house was to the point of it falling apart myself. It sucked cause I never had the money to fix it. The way I solved that situation was moving out eventually, course I was old enough to do so. To be honest you may just have to rough it out till you can move out or get a job to help fix up the place. As for your dad it honestly sounds like your mom should divorce him. He obviously is a problem around the house. Don't let what he says to you bother you though. You're never worthless unless you are just complete scum and from the sounds of it you don't seem anywhere near that. Best advice I can give is as I said, just tough it out and realize it'll get better eventually. Take walks or go hiking to get your mind off the problems at your house, maybe also try to take your brother and sister along just to get them out. Sometimes it helps just being away from the problem for awhile to get your sanity back. If money is a issue and you desperately want to get out of that situation, I'd say when you can get a job to do so and perhaps talk to your mom about you, her, and the rest of your siblings of finding another place even if it's to rent. There is a solution to every problem. Just calm your mind and try to look at your options

I have a job already and it's nice going there because like you said: it keeps my mind off of things back at home. We already found a place for rent but my parents got back together after that. Things were going okay and my dad was actually changing to be a better person. But as usual things didn't turn out and now my parents will be getting a real divorce.

This is probably garbage advice but, honestly if you let things other people say get to you and they make you depressed/sad/angry, and you continue to value their opinion you'll get stuck in what I call the never-ending loop of despair, it basically states that the worse you feel about yourself the more you will believe negative views of yourself and from others resulting in a worse feeling, despair has no depths, wrath has no end, and fury stretches the world over. there is no limit to how angry,upset,depressed you can feel about yourself, I know I've been on this loop, the only way to end it is to change your perception about yourself how you do this is really dependent on what you believe about yourself, if you believe your lazy (you might not be, I truly was) clean the house up take on some additional responsibility like cooking supper, or taking the trash out)(just an example don't take it as me saying your lazy). Try to find something that makes you feel refreshed, like taking a shower. if you truly believe something about yourself regardless of whether or not its true, fix it then flip the script on whoever said that about you, you mentioned your dad called you stupid, find whatever he likes to do, get smarter than him at it, next time he has trouble with it one up his ass. you also mentioned "Everyone is scared" of your dad. bulk up do some weight training at the school keep at it eventually you won't have to be scared of him anymore, hell you don't even need to be now, muscularity isn't everything, knowledge trumps brawn every time (some people have trouble understanding this "saying", if you get mugged or bullied by someone larger than you and the bully/thug "knows they can do it" you can use this to set a trap for them, personally I just carry a knife people usually "puss out" when they see the 6" double bladed sickle I carry then again they might just be more scared of me than I am of them, pale white guy with purple (bags ? w/e insomniacs get under the eyes ) makes you straight look like a killer or a guy that just doesn't give a -blam!-. TL:DR; Sticks and stones may break your bones but words will only hurt you if you let it, change your perspective of yourself and its like you got god mode shit talkers beware. EDIT1: also doesn't hurt to have a hobby like computer programming(You can teach yourself everything for free online somethings come with experience don't worry you'll mess up alot like I and every other programmer in the world but practice makes perfect plus you not only can do some cool things with programming, you can make your friends jealous, believe you are some computer wizard/hacker, make a great deal of money if you have the conviction to see projects through to the end, get to know some really cool dudes and gals and have a bit of fun.) I also do a little bit of 3d animation not that good but seeing that default cube turn it something halfway decent gives you a great sense of accomplishment. you might like doing something with music. pretty much anything you want to learn you can learn online through sources like youtube, wikipedia, google, Cprogramming.com, cplusplus.com, blender.org, blenderartists.org, etc you can find information on even harder to learn things like Biology, Electrical Engineering, Architecture. The world is what you make it, albeit your going to face more than your fair share of shitty people, shitty jobs, shitty weather, you just gotta take things one day at a time, and find the light that makes everything worthwhile, for me its Electronics, Science and Art, for others its Music, Architecture, Philosophy. While your In school let me warn you DO NOT UNDERESTIMATE THE USEFULNESS OF MATHEMATICS ESPECIALLY ADVANCED MATH LIKE CALCULUS. Math can and will help you in just about every career,job, hobby you can think of math is probably the most useful thing in the world. I know its boring, I know geometry is especially boring, I made the mistake of thinking i could breeze through geometry twice, failed it the first time by 12 points, narrowly passed the second time because I did extra credit. Do good in school try your hardest on your SAT/ACT whichever your state has. get help from tutors if you need it, it doesn't make you any "dumber" than anyone else to ask for help. according to the states of Tennessee and North Carolina I'm mentally retarded because both states refused to take the time to teach me basic algebra and instead labeled me as retarded perhaps in a bid to get more education money I have a much more difficult time trying to get a job (didn't help that I was unaware 6 months at one place is the industry standard to consider you proficient enough to work in that field again) atm not even mcdonalds will hire me. short Stay in school do good, when you get your first job hold on to it for at least 6 months to a year or more before moving on to your next job and when you want to change jobs start applying while you are working at the job you want to leave and make sure you are guaranteed that job before you leave your current one, because if you don't and you quit your job then start looking if you were on your own you'd be up the creek without a paddle. By the way if you haven't noticed I have horrible grammar and typing/writing habits.

It was a bit long and I'll admit: a little boring but alas it came out to help me. I do have a job at a small machine shop right now which is very helpful. As a hobby I write. Currently I'm righting a book that I hope will get me famous. I already have planned the sequels and prequels for the series and if they don't make me famous, then they'll still be good stories for my friends and family. Plus it gives me something to do. I love knives by the way. I need to by me a nice big black one with a silvered edge on it. It needs to have an ergonomic handle though. My love for weaponry would probably have people thinking that I'm a psychopath.

[url=http://i.ytimg.com/vi/PL0sC12k5-U/maxresdefault.jpg]This is the one I'm talking about[/url] not exactly ergonomic, but it'll make a grown man cringe with fear

I'm not really one for double blades but I suppose that'd get the job done. I'd rather have a big single bladed knife.

yeah I prefer throwing knives but sadly finding "Real" ones is a bit of a challenge most are just really cheap knockoffs with ultra dull blades and usually break after a couple throws. I'm almost certain the knife I have would chip or break eventually the blade is razor thin but razor sharp as well

I've never thrown a knife to be honest. I don't want to break anything. Plus I don't really have a spot to throw them in the first place.

wooden fence, a thick tree, some old cardboard boxes, you definitely gotta be careful though release at the wrong time and you could wind up with a serious injury like a gouged eye or a pierced artery.

I know when to throw it and I'm pretty sure I know how. I've just never physically done it. I've thrown tomahawks before in boyscouts (that was a long time ago). I was pretty good at it too.

No shame it speaking out, look at yourself in the mirror and see that person you really are not what other people tell you you are. Figure out what is important to you and focus on that.

Do you truly believe you are worthless?...

Not entirely. I suppose it depends on the mood I'm in. On January fourteenth I must have been really feeling down to say all that stuff that I said. All of it's true but, normally I try to ignore all that and just deal with it. I'm feeling a lot better today. Though the more I delve on this subject it makes me think of all the other difficulties I deal with. But everyone has difficulties. Thank you for answereing my cry for help. It really means a lot to me knowing that there are people out there as kind as yourself.

We were born strong so that we may lend our strength. This I believe with absolute conviction. There is always Light, even in the depths of the Void. We are born Guardians, CO creators of this world. A friend is never far and we are never alone. A Lion always guards there Pride unconditionally and this you understand intuitively =)

Wow. I was blown away when I read this. Those are words to live by right there. Say, I'm writing a book right now and was wondering if I could use that as a quote in it? I'll only do so if you'll allow me. I'll give proper credits to you. Those are powerful words. I now some people that wouldn't even understand what you just said.

That because they were meant specifically for you ;). I do not believe in coincidence, only design. It would be an honor and a pleasure to share.

Thank you. I wish I had more friends like you. People who support you ,agree with you, tell you you're doing the right thing and aren't corrupted by things like popularity. It's nice to be able to know someone who can be a loving friend and you hardly even know them. I'm not saying I have bad friends necessarily. I'm just saying that at my age people can be an ass hole whenever they feel like it. Humanity can be a terrible thing. Like all animals, it picks on the weak to survive.

People can be fickle and life can be a raging tempest. Faith and belief in ourselves is our greatest strength. Most people are scared, I know I was. One day I realized it was greater to be that which I wished the world to be. A game of angles and inches. A true leader, in my opinion, leads through there actions not primarily there words. This is something modern leaders and most people have forgotten. Words can fall short and be diminished if thrown around loosely. But through words, clear and intentions and most importantly, Belief, we can reshape all of existence. The power of change is infinite. We only need to reach and allow it to reach unto us. If, in a world of apparent chaos one can maintain tranquility of mind, body and spirit then can we truly say chaos even exists?...

I suppose this is all true. I believe you. Have you ever thought of being a therapist or something? You're really helping me here. You're wisdom could probably solve world hunger and world peace.

I suppose It's never really crossed my mind. Sometimes I find myself aloof and wandering. It is certainly food for thought. I truly believe the greatest thing we can do in this life is to be of unconditional service to one another. Funny how the obvious can elude us from time to time :)