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Edited by StudyOfWumbo: 1/11/2015 4:02:15 PM
21

ITT post different versions of the navy seal copypasta

Canadian version Pardon me, did you just say something to me eh? I'll have you know I graduated at the top of my class in the Canadian Politeness Force, and I've been involved in numerous secret runs to Tim Hortons, and I have over 300 confirmed friends. I am trained in welcoming warfare and am the most passive aggressive member of the entire canadian population. You are a person that I have yet to make friends with. I will talk to you with kindness the likes of which have never been seen before on this earth, mark my passiveness. You think you can get away with not saying thank you? Think again, neighbour. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of syrup drinking penguins across the northern territories and your IP is being traced so you better prepare for the gift baskets, buddy. The gift baskets that not only contain Gift cards, but donuts from tim hortons too. You're gonna be befriended, guy. I can be nice anywhere, anytime, and can be nice to you in over seven hundred ways, and that's just if I write letters. Not only am i extensively trained in passive aggressive combat, but I have access to the entire moose army of the Canadian Maple Leaf Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to welcome your friendly ass right into the neighbourhood. You little neighbourino. If you had only known what friendly retribution your comment was about to bring down, maybe you would have eaten poutine with me. But you couldn't, you didn't, and now you're gonna let me pay the bill because that's how nice I am, guy. I will put you in the hospital and it will cost nothing cause our healthcare is free. I'll say sorry now, friendo.

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  • What the darn-diddily-doodily did you just say about me, you little witcharooney? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class at Springfield Bible College, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret mission trips in Capital City, and I have over 300 confirmed baptisms. I am trained in the Old Testament and I’m the top converter in the entire church mission group. You are nothing to me but just another heathen. I will cast your sins out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before in Heaven, mark my diddily-iddilly words. You think you can get away with saying that blasphemy to me over the Internet? Think again, friendarino. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of evangelists across Springfield and your IP is being traced by God right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggorino. The storm that wipes out the diddily little thing you call your life of sin. You’re going to Church, kiddily-widdily. Jesus can be anywhere, anytime, and he can turn you to the Gospel in over infinity ways, and that’s just with his bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in preaching to nonbelievers, but I have access to the entire dang- diddily Bible collection of the Springfield Bible College and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your sins away off the face of the continent, you diddily-doo satan-worshipper. If only you could have known what holy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you from the Heavens, maybe you would have held your darn-diddily-fundgearoo tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re clean of all your sins, you widdillo-skiddily neighborino. I will sing hymns of praise all over you and you will drown in the love of Christ. You’re farn-foodily- flank-fiddily reborn, kiddo-diddily.

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