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originally posted in:Dads of Destiny
2/4/2015 4:46:39 AM
19
bedtime techniques
So this is my first dad related post on here and feel a bit new to this lol. I'm the father of a beautiful 10 month old girl, I'm also a first time dad. Well the wife and I have been struggling with her to set up a routine and to have her go to bed at a decent hour...(means extra time for me on destiny too lol, don't tell the wife :/). Well I was curious on what the other dads have done, what worked well and what didn't? I know fatherhood is kinda like a trial and error type thing but having the occasional cheese isn't always a bad thing :).
English
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I'd like to thank all the dads out there for the responses. Lol wow yall have shown my wife that this group is much more than just a group of gaming dads but a community that wants to help. I think tonight we are really going to try to start implementing the bedtime routine and really try to hone in on what works for her. After a few days I'll report back on how she's doing. Thanks again to all my fellow DoD, if you find me find me on Xbox one feel free to add me or message me gt is raven1179.
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My 8 month old is the same way until we got him on a schedule. "Dinner" for him at 4-5pm, 30-45 minute nap, play until 9pm, then rice cereal + bottle + rocking to sleep = out by 10pm and clear sleeping until 6-7am the next morning. Good luck!
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I just took two or three Tylenol PMs and 2 shots of rum...I had no idea what was going on an hour after that
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So here's the update. We have been pretty successful so far sticking to the schedule and she has responded well to the routine. We started with the whole clean up of toys then brushing teeth, followed promptly by book time and lastly feeding and complete lights out. She has been falling asleep by 9-10cst which then leaves me free to game lol. Sadly though today I'm stuck at a wedding when I should really be upgrading my new hunger of crota. So those guardian dads out there please think of me as you take on the darkness today. Thanks again to all you dads ( and mom :) ) of destiny for posting the great advise.
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Establish a routine and stick to it. It will often take 2 weeks for kids to adjust to the new routine. At 10 months, if I remember correctly, it would be bath, books, bottle, song, bed. There were definitely times though that I would walk her around the neighborhood to get her to fall asleep. Either in front pack or stroller. I think the noise and outside air and wind on her face was soothing.
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1 ReplyMy two are 8 & 10 now but when they were that age it was always tea at 5:30, bath at 6:30 and cuddles/stories in bed til they slept. Worked a treat every time. Also if they woke up in the night we would never talk to them just stroke their hair etc until they drifted back off. Just sort of let them know you are around but try not to stimulate them too much, make sense? Don't get me wrong we had many sleepless nights but 9/10 the routine worked well.
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2 RepliesWe used a professional sleep consultant and it changed our lives. There is not a one size fits all solution, it depends on the dynamics within the household and breaking bad habits that are already there. Our consultant worked by email and telephone so I'm sure they can help wherever you are in the country (USA). It was a single fee of $150.00 and we got all the support and guidance that we needed. It was the best money we ever spent. PM me if you would like me to put her in touch with you for an informal discussion.
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Dinner 6, jeopardy at 7, jammies at 730. Bed at 8. Same thing, every night. He's out by 820, easy.
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With my girls (1 and 4) its dinner around 7 since I don't get home till 630, clean up the kitchen and bath time at 8, baby goes down to sleep around 830, then 4yo watches a movie or pays with toys until bedtime at 930. When I put her to bed she sometimes wants a quick story, lights out by 945. I usually lay on the floor in her room because she goes to sleep quicker that way. My wife stays at home with them so they don't have to be up early for daycare, that's why they go to bed a bit later than most kids. They usually stay asleep until at least 8am.
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Edited by Darthmaximus: 2/4/2015 5:46:30 PMRoutine is key. My 3yr old is so much on a schedule and routine that when its screwed with leading up to bed time he like freaks out and doesn't want to go to bed. If he doesn't get his dinner, bath, then movie time with me or cartoons with mom, then 2-3 short stories before bed he won't go to bed. We have had family visiting on and off for the last 3 weeks and he is nothing but a total crab ass. For better or worse they have all went back home and we are able to get him back on his schedule. Only problem is he has set his bedtime anywhere between 7 and 730. Kind of puts a cramp in wanting to go out for dinner or something after work but thats ok, cooking at home is healthier and generally cheaper. Oh and his wake up time no matter the day of the week is b/t 5 and 6 am...fun stuff.
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I've got an 11 month old daughter (third child). Between 8-9 she goes to bed each night. 9 if she's in a good mood earlier if she's being a grump. We typically rock her and give her a bottle before hand in the darkened room to calm her down. When the bottle is done or she starts playing with it she goes into the crib. Some nights she doesn't like this but we let her cry it out, as long as it's under 10 minutes. She usually doesn't get past 5 minutes. Another piece is she gets up at pretty much the same time each morning. We've found that during vacations where we sleep in things start getting dicey at bedtime. So baby down by 9, wife down by 10 and it's playtime for dad.
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10 months old. Yeah, I remember that (currently, the twins are 6yo). At 10mo, they would not go to sleep unless I rocked and sang to them. It simply wasn't happening. I tried for months to get them to lay in their crib by themselves, to no avail. After they got to be old enough to talk, I finally got them to go to bed without being rocked or sung to. Then, one day, my girl asked to be rocked. I almost said "no". But, I thought about it. How much longer will she want me to rock her to sleep or sing to her? So, I kept rocking them to sleep. At some point, I think when we finally got them separate rooms, they no longer asked to be rocked. Still miss that sometimes.
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Routine, routine, routine worked for our three boys, always the same and around the same time +/- 10min. Dinner Bath Moisturise (One has eczema and gets it daily) Brush teeth Stories/reading Bed 730pm +/- They don't go straight to sleep (I can hear them talking at the moment) but they know they're not allowed out unless it's for the toilet and if they do come out its straight back to bed.
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First off, congratulations! You'll hear this a thousand times, but I can't stress enough for you to enjoy these first few years. Any trials that you think you're going through are nothing compared to the mouth/expenses/attitude you're going to run into when they hit the teens! Anyway, I've got twins and what worked for one doesn't necessarily work for the other. What worked on my little girl was to wrap her (bind her, really) in this straight jacket thing called a swaddle. My little boy would go ballistic if we put him in it, though. Classical music with some Widespread Panic and Led Zeppelin thrown in seemed to work, too. Like the other dads have said, routine is big, so experiment until you find something that works well and try to stick to it, even if they fuss about it. They'll eventually get settled in and you can get back to more Destiny or making more babies, lol.
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All I can say is trial and error. I have 2 boys and things not to do I have found are: Don't give them a crutch to lean on, such as sleeping in same bed, picking them up to much or talking to them. A little cry here and there does hurt. We found just setting a good routine early, reading to them before bed, alternating who puts them down so they don't get bothered by one of you not being their(plus you both made her so she has to know that your both her parents), a pre bed snack doesn't go astray (even we feel tied on a full stomach). I am sure plenty of dads can help shed some light but it all comes down to what works for you in the end, and don't be afraid to mix it up as long as the main routine is used as a foundation. Stick to your guns show them who's boss from the start and you'll be fine.
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Well man, after reading all the comments, its pretty clear what you should do. I sort of have the same issue too. My is 2 years old. She knows the routine, (since me and my wife alternate bedtime duties) but there are times when its my night were shes becomes stubborn and will fight me for almost an hour that shes not tired. I think its because moms and daughters (or youngsters in general) have some type of tighter bond. Mainly we cant just whip out a boob and calm them down. What I do is read to them or even hum some corny song until they get used to it. (hold their hands or whatever) Its going to boil down to ROUTINE ROUTINE ROUTINE. Remain strong & all should work out.
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3 RepliesWhat really worked for us ( I have a 6 month old boy) was the 3 b's bath , bottle ,bed , the bath really helps to relax him, and try and work it so you last bottle is at the same time each night , even if he's not due we give him a little top up , works a treat for us . I suppose it depends on how your little one takes the bath I know some kids hate it lol
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1 ReplyMy wife generally handles our 9 month old as she nurses him before putting him down. My wife is all about the routine so we've been working the same schedule since the little guy moved to his own room. Sometimes a bath can help calm them down. Reading and rocking in a chair. Routine is the biggest. It's a crap shoot man, and the little suckers don't come out with a manual. You'll get it down.
