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Edited by Britton:
4/30/2015 4:16:36 AM
800
Creatively open this box.
Open this box in a creative manner and ill tell you whats inside.
Lack of imaginations need not apply. If you're lame the box wont open.
[b]2000+ replies[/b] best thread ever
[b]I will be replying at my leisure. Feel free to help others open the box.[/b]
1. [b][u]YOUR DICK WONT OPEN THE BOX[/u][/b]
2. Saliva isnt a good box opener either.
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2 RepliesDeath Star shoots the box
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1 ReplyI take control of the U.S laser satellite and open with powerfull rays
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2 RepliesFirst, I seduce it over the course of four months and three full length movies. Then, when the secks is about to happen, I slap it with my dick. The box laughs at my attempts. While it is laughing, I shove a porcupine into the box, putting many tiny holes in it. I then unleashed a horde of twenty guinea pigs upon that side, eating into the cardboard like its a fat but at thanksgiving.
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2 RepliesI use my front dorsal fins to rip a piece of coral of the reef, then after sharpening it with my teeth I make a slingshot out of seaweed and launch the sharpened coral at the box.
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2 RepliesOP has found Lord Numeror a box.
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2 RepliesI'll use mind powers but it only opens half so then I would invent a time machine go to the future and steal the box when my future self opens it
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1 ReplyI blowtorch the box open
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2 RepliesEdited by Kai Gremory: 2/5/2015 7:58:59 PMI lift the box up with a crane in preparation of dropping it but then Spider-Man swings on by snatching the box only to turn the corner getting shot down by Chris Kyle. The object inside the box starts slipping out of the box but is swallowed up my a giant T-Rex before anyone could see it. The dinosaur charges to the ocean but is confronted by the godly Cthulu and is eating by him. Staring in awe, I snap out of it and catch ironman in the corner of my eye. I beat him in a sarcasm contest and take his suit in attempt to retrieve the box. As I fly for Cthulu, Megatron and Optimus Prime arise from the waters fighting next to Goku and Superman. Their fights were so intense it created a huge explosion killing Cthulu shooting the box up into the air. I fly towards it, feet away from grabbing it then all of a sudden Deadpool grabs the box calling me a fgt and dives down. He sees Grr and immediately drops the box and becomes distracted by the awesome, kawai robot from invader Zim. I then walk up to the box... And get teleported to the league of legends and become a champion to fight under the summoners. Thinking to myself, "WHAT THE FUUUUU..." Teemo approaches me saying, "It's okay man. Just sign here, here annnnd here to solve all of your problems. I try to ignore the fellor but his global passive is just too stronk. Later on down my career in the league I am confronted by Xúr, Agent of the Nine, who tells me I can buy the box from him for a cheap price of just 17 Lenny faces. Luckily for me I was paid in this currency from the league. Finally with the box in my hands I realize that it now has a lock on it. Xúr says to me that he has the key for a cheap price of just 13 Lenny faces. Sadly I was 3 short and already did the weekly on all 3 characters. I thought fast and brought the box to DeeJ and he was able to open it like a girl opens her legs for Drake. We both glaze in amazement as we find out that the thing inside the box was... In Bacon We Trust
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7 RepliesEdited by IiIiIiIiIiI: 2/5/2015 6:58:23 PM*Sees hint* *Proceeds to stick penis in box*
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1 ReplyI opened the box and there was nothing at first glance, but then i saw it. The string. I lightly tugged at it and it revealed a secret compartment. I now know whats in the box...
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2 RepliesI look at the box and quickly realize this is no ordinary box. I try to open it by using my laser eyes but to no avail, the lasers bounce off and hit my turtle, my turtle dies. "NOT SHELDON!" I yell. I then begin to cry, my tears flowing onto the box and softening it. I then suddenly stop crying and swear vengeance upon this box, I WILL OPEN IT IF ITS THE LAST THING I DO! With a wicked gleam in my eye, I pull out my secret weapon, a poptart (hot fudge sundae flavor) and begin to slowly, painfully slice open the box with it.
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1 ReplyIf I just open the box, won't I get to see what la inside no matter the way I open it? Hmm?
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1 ReplyTell mah gf itz a present... Too bad i dont have a girlfriend :,( liek if yu cri evrytiem
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2 RepliesI have the box fall in love with me, then perform seteppeku, the box will open itself in despair, and with my dyin breath I see what is in te box and self regenerAte
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2 RepliesI update drivers and install official software that lets me force open the box. That doesn't work. So I dig through pages of a Google search looking for answers, and find a third party software destined to force open the box. That also doesn't work. I boot up the original software, force quit the box from existence, and then uninstall the drivers and software. I go back to playing video games.
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2 RepliesMeh, it's a box filled with sh*t, so i throw it away in a garbage can & move on with my life.
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14 RepliesEdited by Couch: 2/5/2015 5:55:53 AM*slicks hair back* *puts on psychiatrist glasse" "Scho tell me Mr. Box, vhy is so hard for you to open up to people? I't not like you have any dirty secrets inside, no? Vell, I believe vee have made much progress today, but vee have a long road ahead of us." [i]I vill get that box to open up. It just needs time...[/i]
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3 RepliesI initially try to open the box with simple means The Box is angered,does not open, it challenges me to a 1v1...or at least that's what I got from it's arrogant silence. I get wrecked by the Box. The Box clearly to MLG for a mere causal such as I. I leave the battlefield full of piss,blood and shame. I must better my self. *I train vigorously,In the mountain of Asgard, The Frostlands, I train in Darkness Depths Of the Abyss,The darkest depths of the sea, I train in the Darkest Depths of the Darkest Depths, The center of volcanoes,In the Heart of the Sun, I train while on a train, I train with a trainer,his name is Brad,he's a pretty cool guy. honing my skills,mastering martial arts and swordsmanship. I'm trained by the Masters,Then I'm trained by the Masters of Mastering. I become worthy to lift even Mjolnir while wearing Mjolnir,Thor & Master Chief are impressed. After 5 years of Mastering my skills I journey home. *The clouds part,A beam of light comes down* *landing Majestically,I dismount my Half Lion,Half Dragon,All Awesome Creature. I see the box,The Box knows why I returned. The Box agrees to meet me on the Moon. The battle ensues,The Box has grown in power since our last encounter, but so have I. The clashing of our power begins to tear the moon asunder,each blow shaking it's very foundation. I reveal the legendary Excalibur Soul Edge Calibur to the Box,The Box is shocked...or at least that's what I draw from it's stunned silence. I deliver a fatal blow, then deliver a moon shattering punch that sends the box back to Earth. at light speed,I fly back to earth. IN a giant crater,The Box Lay, knowing it was all over. The Box lay there condescendingly silent, as if it were saying "It, matters not,You'll never open me"..or at least ..nevermind. But alas,I had acquired a Keyblade for plot convenience sometime ago,and I won't be bothered to specify when. I point the keyblade,the box opens, I am engulfed by an aura of blinding light.
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3 RepliesI hurl turtles from an endless bucket at the box until its opens to reveal more turtles
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1 ReplyI first firmly grasp the box, then I-ALLAHU AKBAR.
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1 ReplyI kill someone the box trusts. Then I take their disguise and get close to the box. When he suspects nothing I FIBER WIRE HIM! When he's dead I drag him to a place where I can safely examine the box.
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5 RepliesIt was a chilly winter morning when the box appeared at my doorstep. Not a single being made itself known on this morning, the only thing to be heard was the dim hum of the wind and the crunch of snow under my boot. I'd been retrieving my mail when I noticed a box and a dog sitting on my porch. I quickly disregarded the dog as it was simply my dog Little Stewie, but what really grabbed my attention was the box. So hastily folded together, the cardboard hung loose. The dull color of the box only added to the atmosphere that hung about on this crisp winter morning. I thought to myself, [i]I haven't ordered anything recently.[/i] That was when I realized that when I'd gone to get my mail, I'd been struck by a car that, instead of helping, hastily drove off to avoid paying insurance. I'd been disoriented and wandered to a house which was not mine. Blood oozed from my forehead, I looked behind me and saw a trail of my essence stretch the length of a football field behind me. [b]I collapsed.[/b] I heard the sound of something approaching me, struggling to lift my head up, I blurringly saw the box approaching me. "Open me. You will be saved." It said to me. I stretched out my arms to grab the box. That's when I realized, my hands were no longer there. They'd be torn off by the wolf that I thought was my dog. He called over his wolf friends and they began their feast. I couldn't move, I'd become one with the world. Out of the woods I saw a man-like figure approach, it entered the light revealing itself to be Shia LaBeouf. I tried to scream, but my mouth only opened and collapsed around me as I blinked out of the spatial plane. I am one with the universe, I am the beginning and the end. It was a chilly winter morning. -Audicia
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5 Replies//opens box
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2 RepliesEdited by rXn BadWolf: 2/5/2015 3:12:23 PMI spread warm melted butter between the boxes thighs, slowly caressing them until they open their secrets upon to me
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2 RepliesI circumcise myself with a potato peel and eat it to release my spirit animal, the banana slug. I cut open my scrotum and let the slug die inside my gametes. My testicles decompose. I rub the dead organ and tissue on the box and chant a very dark and evil spell. Dick Cheney appears and gives me his blessing to open the box
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1 ReplyWell at least buy me a drink before you open me.
