Why You Should Always Have Sex On A First Date

[quote]Ladies – we’ve all heard it before: every woman’s magazine, all your girlfriends and every dating site have always been adamant about one rule of dating – no sex on the first date. Even Millionaire Matchmaker, Patti Stanger, is strict about the rule “no sex without monogamy.” You know Patti Stanger is still single, right? I’m here to tell you to ignore what everyone says and go ahead and bang him on the first date. How do I know? Well, nearly all my long-term relationships have stemmed from giving it up on date one – including my now husband. Sexually compatible From a girl who has slept with countless amounts of men, and a few ladies – I know from doing my research that it’s difficult to find a good lay nowadays. We are all into different things in bed, and if he has a really f*cked up fetish like symorophilia, mucophilia or plushophilia – trust me, you want to find this out straight away and get the f*ck out of there. And if you didn’t really have a good time on your date, but you find him really ridiculously hot, the sex might be amazing and boom: you’ve found yourself a new f*ck-buddy! Penis size I don’t know about you, but when I’m interested in a man, my mind usually goes towards the issue of size: the size of his wallet and also the size of his penis. Sure, every guy probably thinks that he’s huge, but ladies – we know that the majority of men are average at best. So, before you invest any of your valuable spare time in this man, it’s advantageous for you to meet his penis – and the sooner, the better. How disappointed would you be if you dated this man for weeks, invested weekends where you forwent hanging out in the Hamptons with your girlfriends getting white girl wasted, only to discover that your potential boyfriend has a weird, bendy dick, is an uncircumcised sharpei, or has a penis the size of a cocktail wiener? Take my advice and investigate down south sooner rather than later. Avoids Awkwardness When there is so much sexual tension between the two of you, it tends to make things awkward. While courtship and dating are fun, a lot of the time dating is a bit of a drag. After all, isn’t all that dating just leading to the big finale of a climax? Having sex on the first date greatly reduces the anxiety that you both are experiencing and also eliminates all the trivial concerns that go with dating. If you bang him on the first date, you don’t really need to worry so much about the impression you’re giving off on the second date – feel free to show up in yoga pants and a tank top because – guess what? He’s already seen you naked! The jig is up. And all those games that you play on the first few dates can also be eradicated – not sure about who is going to pay the check? Feel free to push that bill right over to him because, guess what? You sucked his dick last week. He can at least pay for dinner. Investment of time We are all busy and time-poor in today’s hectic world. Dating is a huge endeavor that not only sucks up your free time, but sometimes it could end up costing you money; money that you can be spending on those new shoes, liposuction or Botox. Sex, on the other hand, is a good gauge of whether all this effort is worth it, so why go through countless dates only to find out that hey – maybe you don’t want his penis in you? Alternatively, if you bang him right away, you can make an informed decision about whether you want to invest anymore of your valuable time and money into this man. Let’s face it – we are busy ladies. F*ck being coy – go out and get laid. If it feels right, do it. Good things comes to those who wait? I say wait too long and no one gets to come.[/quote] Although she brings up some valid points, this article still made laugh a lot more me than it should have. inb4tfwnogf