Need Advice, Warning Long Read

Alright Yuki, I'm not to vet only been married for 3 and half years, but it seems that your wife sees how close the two of you are. And with her not getting you a present or a party maybe just maybe she's pissed with herself and your receiving the backlash(this sucks I get it quite a bit). I know spending all night in a hospital on your bday sucks, but just think she was there for her friend that just had a baby. And you did let your wife know it wasn't a big deal. So she may have thought to herself that maybe the gift and party would be able to slide since that's what you said. Anyways I think communication might be key here, I know you were hyped about your party and gift, but just try and talk with her let her know that its OK. Don't even bring up your bosses gift unless she does. Make it about her, concentrate the conversation on how she's feeling. You will figure out what she's mad about when she starts opening up. And last but not least after attempts to communicate, back off just give her space to breath maybe talking to your boss about other things should then work should be placed on hold, just explain to your boss that this is a patching time...no need to add more tender to the flame. Hope this helps bud

When people, especially women in my (granted very limited experience) feel guilty about something, it makes them (or us, I include myself in this group) very irritated. We tend to strike out at the subject of our irritation and guilt, even if the cause of that irritation or guilt is a promise that we failed to keep, or something we forgot to do. There are a few reasons why she is pissy, most likely it is because she is either, or both, jealous at your boss (an Asian woman like her) for doing something nice for you or she is feeling guilty for not doing the same despite the similar situations. My advice would be to sit down with her and explain, clearly and calmly, that you are disappointed and it is not the birthday that had you disappointed, it is the promises which were not kept. Say that you understand that her friend was having a baby, and that you are glad to share part of that joy with her, but there has been no sign that she remembered her promises. Tell her what you told us, that you were looking forward to this birthday [i]because[/i] of her promises, and that you had hoped to share [i]this[/i] joy and [i]this[/i] experience with her. Be understanding, be compassionate, and remember that a marriage is built on promises, but that sometimes promises get put on a back burner with the best of intentions, and never taken off. If you love your wife, all else follows. I would still buy the headset yourself though, and splurge a bit :D