Chapter 4: into the abyss

Weyland Axel and I had been traversing the ocean floor for what seemed like an eternity. I still wasn't sure how he helped me breath underwater. Maybe it was through some sort of osmosis, or some ancient magic that had long since been forgotten. I swam behind him and tried to keep up, but frogs are a lot more adept at swimming than homosapiens. All of a sudden I felt a voice intrude into my mind. "We must enter this cave network to find Chick Chain." Normally I would have been awestruck by the fact that he could communicate telepathically, but with all the strange things that I had seen in such a short amount of time I just went with it. He then added, "I don't like this place...it is full of danger and dark creatures. We must disguise ourselves before we enter." I thought to myself for a second before responding and Weyland added, "I do not think that I sound like Liberace by the way." With a look of shock I said, "Hey you... get out of my head." He then replied, "Well if you don't want to breath that is fine by me...That is what I thought...and by the way I think you sound like a discount stoner Keanu Reeves...LOL..." I then said, "Was the LOL really necessary?" "Well I can't exactly use my smart phone down here can I?" With a breath of exasperation I said, "Geez, the balls on this frog right here..." and of course he had a witty comeback. "Why do you think I'm swimming in front of your face?" but he added, "I'm just trying to take your mind off of what lies ahead." I then countered, "Well I would believe you a lot more if you weren't laughing." We hovered just over the cave entrance and Weyland said, "Okay now lets disguise ourselves." He then materialized a suit that resembled a narwhal. "Now put this on he said." With a look that said upward inflection I said, "Somehow I don't think that they will believe me for a second." He then replied, "Just trust me and you will be fine." So with a shrug of my shoulders I donned the suit. I was like, "You do know that I look like one of those stupid super Mario 3 costumes right? Its like I was the character who was left on the cutting room floor of that game. I mean just look at this horn..." He didn't reply. He just motioned for me to enter the cave. It was completely enveloped in darkness. I don't think light had touched it since the beginning of time. The only thing I could see while we traveled down the cave were the rufescent eyes of the creatures that inhabited this place. The hair on my neck was standing straight up, because I could feel that all manner of insidious dark creatures made this their home. I wished I could feel the light of the sun upon me so it could wash away this darkness that encapsulated me. When we got to the tunnels' end, I could see Chicken Chain. I don't know why it resembled the scene with Jaba the hut in return of the jedi and Chicken Chain was princess Leia, but it did. The enormous sloth like creature, which even sounded like Jaba, said, "I didn't think Nup Nups' servitor would arrive until later. Why are you here early?" With my best improv I replied, "Because there has been trouble with Xur." Then without question he handed me the leash, but as I was about to leave he asked, "What is Nup Nups' reason for fighting?" I thought to myself, "Weyland what do I say?" But the sloth beat me to the punch, "I can read minds too. Imposter!!!" Then suddenly all the creatures menacingly surrounded us and backed us into a corner. "What do I do Weyland?" "Use the narwhal horn young padawon." I could feel it in my hands and it trembled with power. Before the first incubus could strike I cut through him like butter. Wielding it like a samurai I resembled a tornado and cut them all down as quickly as they arrived. The sloth said, "Just leave my cave and go with Chicken Chain. I will not pursue you." I should not have trusted him for a second, because when my back was turned he shot a bolt of iridescent goo at me. Right before it hit me though, Weyland took the blast...While lying there dying he said, "Finish him...just like mortal kombat..." I was filled with an indignant rage and threw the horn right into his head. I then said, "Flawless victory bitch." But then turned my attention to Weylands' motionless limp body.